Unherd (The Unpublished Edition)

Author's Note

"Unherd" takes place several months after the ending of "Fawned". It directly follows the KU published version, which differs from the Wattpad draft.

Major changes include name changes and an extended ending. Below is a list of name changes, spoilers for the extended ending will be after the author's note:

Jensen = Seth
Veronica = Savannah
Wes = Jason

~~~

It's been a while, hasn't it?

First of all, let me say thank you for the response "Fawned" has continued to receive. Honestly, 4 years ago, I would've thought it would've been forgotten by now, but you guys have continued to vote, continued to comment — few of you even came back to read it again — and I am incredibly grateful.

A couple of you messaged me or commented asking for an update on Unherd, and well: here we are.

Originally, I planned for Unherd to be a direct-to-Kindle release, but I also didn't plan for this to take 4 years.

After "Fawned" was officially published, I entered a very strange part of my life. The day it went to Kindle, I was living in a hotel room. In the year that followed, I had to pack up and move 3 separate times. During that time, I was experiencing symptoms of derealization. My day job had me feeling like a literal cog in a machine, I wasn't socializing enough, and it caused me to spiral.

Somehow, despite all of that, I found love. It was long distance, so it felt safe at the time, but 3 years later, the distance set in. So I'm single again if any alt-guys around the NYC/NJ area in their mid 20s-30s are interested.

I tried to write. I had most of Unherd drafted.

But I got a new job, I put myself out there, I got involved in community theatre — I felt real again.

I re-read it. And I did not like any of it.

Everyone, even Gil and Barnaby, felt like their kinks first and like people second. Some people might excuse that when it comes to smut, but I wanted this story to be more 3Dimensional than that. I thought about scrapping it entirely (a few times, actually), but Fawned was never meant to be a stand alone. Dallas and Bonnie were mentally conceived at the same time as Gil and Barnaby, so they were always meant to meet; they've grown as characters since their inception, but I can't find it in myself to give up on them, no matter how long it takes to write.

Like the title says, this won't be the final draft, but it'll probably be the closest to it. Consider it an ARC copy, or consider it unprofessional! Color me unserious because I'm at the point where I want to get the ball rolling. I'll be publishing a chapter or two every week until I have a better estimate on when the actual published version will be released. Whenever I do get it up on KU, there will be a week or so when e-book editions are free.

In the mean time, I hope y'all enjoy what I have been working on. Any feedback at all is greatly appreciated. Here's hoping it was worth the wait!

~~~

Spoilers for the extended ending of KU edition "Fawned":

Gil picks up Barnaby to spend New Year's Eve at his family's house. They have dinner with Gil's parents, who Barnaby realizes Gil still has a tense, awkward relationship with.

Once Mr. and Mrs. Connolly leave for the night, Gil and Barnaby make love in Gil's bedroom.

Though neither of them uses the word "love", the emotions are there.

The next day, they get caught up in a double date with Gil's sister Addison, and her girlfriend, Imani. Again, Barnaby sees the strained relationship between Gil and Addison, but once Addison gets a moment with Barnaby alone, she reveals that who Gil is with his family is completely different to how he acts around his lover.

Gil and Barnaby also visit an antique shop, where Savannah (Veronica, Barnaby's manager from the cafe in the Wattpad version) works outside of campus.

Their last stop is a fancy restaurant, where Barnaby resists the temptation to tell Gil he loves him. Instead, he tells him, "I'm fawned of you."

Gil says he gets it, and ending the book, finally confesses, "I love you, too."