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"Easy now, love. Too early to ruin that pretty dress on you, yeah?" Lux, tonight's host and birthday girl swiftly takes the glass of Cheval Blanc from my hand, dropping bits of red on the new white bodycon I got specially for the event. "Is that so?" I almost bit my tongue.
"I heard," Fetching my purse from the glass poseur, Lux drags me to the VIP rooftop area, where her fiancé's friends drown themselves in smoke and alcohol. The space was secluded from the lower bunk, but it was an open area where wind blew so hard it could knock me down with enough booze. "Jairo told me about Clara and Herome."
As if on cue, Jairo and I met gaze as he raised a brief toast to which I was quick to catch with my middle finger. "So that's 'what that mouth can do'." referring to a joke she did once that landed her the guy. "That's one. But really?"
We head towards the glass railing, giggling and savoring the blow of cold air, brushing the hair off my face and down to cover my inked back, almost giving me a sense of comfort like a pat on the back. "What is? That they're apparently married or that they sold the house— both behind my back?" I could only pick on my newly painted nails, chipping on the color I didn't even want in a desperate attempt to deal with the anxiety. If it weren't for Lux's birthday and engagement, I wouldn't have bothered dolling up. Let alone show. But Lux is a sister to me. It's the least I can do. "I'm really sorry, Paige. I always knew Herome was an asshole, but Clara.." She rests her head down my shoulder, a hand around my waist, pulling me into a small hug. "Oh, love. I wish I could do something to help."
That's the thing. Lux and Jairo have become my unofficial adoptive parents after Gared. She will do anything and everything for me.
I remember kicking Gared on the shin at 13 after finding out that he had gotten a girlfriend. But the same year, somehow, I found myself unable to live without Lux. She was the elder sibling I wish I had instead of Gared. But of course, that's not true. I loved them together. I eventually learned to be grateful that Gared gave me Lux. She has become both my sister and best friend. We got along so well, especially when it came to making sure Gared's ears and nose fumed, knowing he couldn't do anything if we decided to screw him over. But that's all before we lost him to cancer 2 years after. Now, everyone has sat down with his early departure. Lux met Jairo at a support group where they kickstarted their awesome love story last year. Lux likes to use the term "awesome" because the day she met Jairo was the day I also turned down the offer to come and met the guy I thought was 'my' Jairo. But I'd rather not spoil into that right now, or ever. Soon, they're about to have a baby girl, and I'm basically about to be homeless.
"Doesn't Herome work at this big firm downtown? It's a bit strange to suddenly just sell the house, don't you think? Unless, you know?" Lux said in between the gasps for air. She had been drinking all night before I showed up. "They spent all his savings on their fancy Maldives wedding while I was at Dad's so now they need to move to compromise because, as it turns out, Herome also quit."
The older girl choked on her drink, "No, no. Choke on this: dear Paige is a big sis now, apparently."
Lux stopped a waitress, and grabbed the bottle of wine and told her to get another, like it was a skit straight from a comedy show. Except, this one wasn't for laughs. Not right now. The waitress came back, and Lux immediately popped the bottle open and handed it to me, doing a small toast with the rears. "Drown yourself to the last drop, love."
"I can't. need to go to campus tomorrow. I have to cancel the internship—"
"Don't bother. You're coming to London with us."
"You're joking."
"I swear by fucking Gared. We're taking you with us. You finish that internship and you skeddadle that fucking madhouse. You hear me?" Lux explained, half yelling. She's got enough to drink tonight; she can't possibly be serious. She's done so much for me, and this just feels too much now.
"You will finish and get that degree and you will live the life Gared had always wanted for you. Okay? I promised him I'd look after you. So I will. We will. Jairo and I will."
"Our little girl might get jealous over how favored her sister is, love." Jairo came over, kissing Lux on the ear, wrapping his freehand around her waist as the other holds his block of alcohol. "Odd thing to say, it almost sounds like you're adopting me, too." I said out of my mind as a joke but hearing it choked me. It was odd. "That's a great idea, actually— don't you think, love?" Lux turned to Jairo who laughed with his eyes. It wasn't a nervous laugh, it was more like a nod to the suggestion his fiancé made. They might just both be under the influence but I'd be lying if I said the idea isn't appealing. It's giving me hopes that I'll be able to run away from this suffocating town.
It isn't the town itself. It's the people. Clara. Herome. It was always just Gared that made it all better. But now that he's gone, I think it's time I made it all better for myself. Clara couldn't care less if I wanted to leave. All she cares about is her lawyer boyfriend. Dad has a new family now, too. It's all working out. It will work out, I know it.
"I'm assuming you're already signing your papers in your head, Paige?" Jairo teased, a parallel smile across our faces. "I'll pay you back. I promise you that."
"Pay us back with one of your steak nights, yeah?" He replied almost immediately.
"Oh my god, so does that mean you're really coming with us?" Lux holds her palms to her mouth in disbelief. Or in alcohol. "Yes, honey. I told you she won't budge." Jairo reassured her.
Whatever that meant, a part of me wanted to tell them that I'd think about it. Perhaps it's the alcohol in my system that I didn't, willingly and selfishly owning the opportunity. I just want to be okay. To be free. And whether or not we were far from sober, I think they would still pursue me to come. Though it never really came across my mind that they would think about taking me. Yet again, they know.
