Silhouette

Ch. 12

Izuku pushed his front door open and stumbled into his apartment. His left hand moved to rest against his new bandages for the broken wrist he'd gotten while fighting the nomu earlier in the night. No one had realized it was broken before he'd gotten healed, and the bone had ended up in the wrong position. The doctors had needed to re-break it and set it. He'd need to wait until tomorrow before he could get healed again. 

When the doctor asked him how he hadn't noticed the broken wrist, he'd shrugged and pointed to all the scars littering his hands. His wrists constantly ached, so he hadn't noticed a difference until it was bent in the wrong direction. 

"You're back." 

Izuku sleepily blinked as Eijirou's head popped out of the living room and into his kitchen. His stupid, beaming smile on his face. 

"Get out of my apartment," he deadpanned, pushing past the redhead as his smile dropped. 

Katsuki snorted from his spot on the couch. "Well, aren't you a ray of fucking sunshine?" 

"Get out," he repeated, his tired eyes looking between the villains, "both of you." 

"Are you mad at me?" Eijirou asked, his brows knitted in confusion. Izuku had never kicked them out, even before he'd decided he could trust them. 

"You sicced a nomu on me," Izuku snapped, using the last of his energy to narrow his eyes at the redhead. "I broke a wrist, got it healed, had it re-broken, and set. Everything hurts, I'm exhausted, and the last thing I wanted to do is see the guy who ordered it to go after me." 

Katsuki pushed himself off the couch with a scowl, crossing his arms. "What happened to no hero and villain shit here? He was doing his job, and you were doing yours. It's over now, so what the hell does it matter?" 

Izuku shut his eyes, his good hand moving to push back his hair. "That's not- It was a nomu, Kacchan," he snapped, already feeling tears in his eyes. "I don't give a fuck about fighting you two. I trust you enough by now to know that you won't kill me, but a nomu? Not only would that thing have killed me if I had been a second too slow, but- No," he cut himself off, shaking his head and using the sleeve of his hoodie to rid his face of any loose tears. "I'm not talking about this with you two. You just need to leave." 

"I'm sorry," Eijirou said, his voice pleading. "It wasn't even an intelligent one! I thought it'd buy me just enough time to get away from you guys. I didn't think-" 

"You have more?" Izuku asked, balking at the knowledge Eijirou had surlye not meant to share. 

From the way the redhead's mouth snapped shut, he knew he'd been right. 

"You handled it just fine, why all the bitching?" Katsuki asked, his red eyes narrowed into slits. He knew there was something else to Izuku's breakdown; it wasn't just about the fight. 

"Because!" he shouted back, eyes blazing in fury. "Because I spent my entire first year of high school, at fifteen years old, nearly dying every month because of those things! Do you even realize how much fucking trauma you two dredged up by throwing a nomu at me?! Obviously, I handled it just fine, I'm a fucking hero, but that's not the damn point. I've been fucking haunted for years by those things, nightmares about everything from being ripped apart to watching my friends being turned into them. I don't give a shit about the fighting, that's my job. What I care about is neither of you even considered how fighting one would affect me. Especially, you, Kacchan. You were there for most of it!" 

He was panting by the end, out of breath from the shouting. As soon as his rant had ended, he regretted it. Not because he thought it hurt the other two to hear, but because why would they care? They were villains; his mental health was the least of their worries. If anything, they should be celebrating that they'd thrown him off his game. The outburst was stupid and pointless, just another show of Izuku getting too close. 

"Just get out," he said, his voice tight but no longer raised. "Don't show up again, or I will arrest you." 

"Iz, please-" Eijirou started, but Izuku just turned toward the hall that led back to his bedroom. 

"No," he said firmly. "This was stupid and a mistake. I won't turn you in, but you're out of free passes. I can't keep one foot on either side of the line anymore. I'm a hero, and I need to start acting like it." 

"Fine," Katsuki spat. 

Izuku couldn't see them, but he listened with his back turned as the blond stomped to the door. There was shuffling that he assumed was Eijirou, probably being dragged along. He didn't start breathing again until his front door was slammed behind them, and he was alone in his apartment. 

"Fuck," he whispered as he headed back for his bedroom. 

He fell into his bed, not bothering to change out of his clothes or move under the blankets. He just laid there, his eyes clenched shut as he promised himself over and over that he wouldn't cry, not over them. It was doomed from the start, and he had always known it, no matter how much he had lied to himself. 

This was fine, he was fine. He was going to go to bed and wake up tomorrow like nothing happened. He'd go to work, see his friends, smile on patrol, and not think about Katsuki or Eijirou. 

Everything was fine. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Everything was undoubtedly not fine. 

In response to the nomu attack, patrols had been doubled up, meaning more frequent and more bodies per patrol. They'd been split into groups of four, two powerhouses and two supports per team. He was partnered up with Todoroki, Uraraka, and Sero for the time being. 

It wasn't that he didn't like them or anything, he just preferred patrolling alone. It was his 'me-time' or something, he didn't know. He just knew he didn't want to be stuck in a group for the foreseeable future. 

"You know," Sero drawled, slinging an arm over Izuku's shoulder as their group headed out for their first patrol. "You could at least act happy to see me. We barely get to hang out anymore." 

The tape hero had a point. After Katsuki's disappearance, Izuku had grown close with all three of his old friends, Sero, Kaminari, and Ashido. They'd bonded over the grief of losing their mutual friend. Once graduation hit, Izuku lost contact with them, even though Sero worked at the same agency. They were usually on opposite shifts, so they rarely ran into each other. 

"I am, promise," Izuku said with a strained smile. "Everything's just kind of..." he trailed off, trying to find the right word to sum up his life at that moment.

"Shitty?" the other hero supplied with a raised brow. 

Izuku nodded in agreement. "Extremely shitty." 

"Good thing you get to hang out with us on patrol then," Uraraka said with a bubbly smile on her lips, a small bounce to her steps. "I know you like going out on your own, but try to make the most of it, yeah? We're stuck with it for a while." 

"Yeah, I know," he said with an exaggerated sigh, a teasing smile forming on his lips with more ease than he had expected. "Just try not to slow me down, okay?" 

"As if!" she shouted as they exited the building and took off into the night. 

Short update for today, sorry. I'm running out of prewritten chapters for this fic and I won't have a bunch of time off 'til next week, so daily updates might stop for a few days while I'm working, sorry lolz.