The Enslavements of Truth and Love

Destiny's Guide

My story started long before people knew me by the name of Ashmael Aldeberan. Way before Wraeththu became the dominant force on the planet, and back at a time where people were still afraid to love who they wanted for fear of being murdered. My story starts the same as so many throughout history. With the sting and unsuspecting gut punch that is love.

I remember the first time I laid eyes on him. It was just after my military drills with my friends when I caught a glimpse of that wild cherry hair of his. He was so pretty, a rebel. He had a look that could level me with his eyes and a face that could melt the coldest of hearts and in that moment I felt like he was this angel who was put on earth just for me. I remember I must have stared at him so long that I looked like an animal. That was until a football hit me in the side of the head and caused me to snap out of whatever stupor I was in.

"Come on, Sinclair get your head in the game." Yelled one of my friends as he ran up to me to make sure I was okay and to give me shit for not catching the ball.

"Sorry.." I replied but honestly, I was still looking for him. He was gone and I felt as if my entire world had gone with him.

If context clues to this story haven't been enough, I am gay. Always have been. Women just don't do it for me. Kissing one was enough to have me wanting to run for the hills, but the thought of marriage and Aghama forbid, sex was enough to make me want to run right into an active volcano. But the time I come from didn't allow open gay relationships. Or gay of any kind. Very close-minded has to be this cookie-cutter religious type and my family was perhaps the worst perpetrators of this. Being raised in this tight-knit Christian community was one thing, but my parents had this horrid way of tying everything back to obtaining wealth. Oh, that was the other thing. I am rich. My grandfather died a few years back and left me a few homes including a mansion and a lake-side vacation home. Also named me as the sole proprietor of his fortune. Because I am not 18 and of legal age to have that money just yet, My parents are executors of my estate and as long as they dont go too wild with spending it's legal.

"Who was that redhead guy?" I asked with no particular target in mind hoping, and praying to get an answer as to who this mysterious person was.

"Oh, that is Vaysh. Stay away from him, Sinclair. Freak likes boys and girls. I think they call it Bisexual. I call it wrong in the eyes of the lord if you ask me"

"Just the name will do, thanks. Vaysh.. wow what an interesting name."

After that, my every thought became about him, and as my luck would have it, he turned up in several classes of mine so I was able to make awkward advances that ended in me just looking at him like I was some sort of idiot. Not my finest moments that's for sure. When I would go to bed at night, I could still see that fire-red hair, that brilliant glow on his perfect skin. It was then I fully came to terms with the fact that I was gay. I wanted him. I wanted to hold him, to kiss him, to do so much more to him. I would often fall asleep with his name stapled to my brain. We barely knew each other and yet, he had already taken up such a spot in my mind. Hours turned into days, days into weeks, and weeks into months. In the second month after I had developed my little crush, I had this profound dream of me holding Vaysh from behind. I was in a military uniform and he was dressed like a woman and had a swollen belly. I woke up from that dream hard as a rock, ready to go. The thought of him pregnant was enough to get me to have a wet dream. I felt no shame in my actions, if god didn't want me to be gay, he would have made me straight. After I had finished and cleaned up, I decided that I needed to talk to him that day. So I went to school that day with high hopes.

"Hey, Henderson!" I said waving Vaysh down hoping that he would heed my call. It was the first time we had ever talked.

"What do you want Sinclair?" Vaysh's irritation with my genuine existence was palpable but I would not be deterred.

"I noticed you didn't eat this morning at breakfast. Either because you forgot weren't hungry or didn't have the money to eat, so I bought you a meal. It is pizza, a salad, and a Sobe. Your favorite right?"

"Okay...firstly you are a fucking creepy stalker arent you? And secondly, I am not some charity case that you jocks can just play with whenever you get bored. Did one of your buddies put you up to this? Ha ha very funny you can bring out the cameras now"

"What are you talking about? Has anyone ever told you that you're a bit paranoid? I bought you a meal because I want to make sure you're eating. Because I like helping people not because I am a charity case... also I have a question to ask you"

Vaysh's demeanor changed if only a little and soon, he was taking a seat and the food that I had brought him "You have five minutes. I will humor you for five minutes, Sinclair."

"I umm..." I tried to talk, but the words were caught in my throat and even the great Hercules would have trouble removing them. Swallowing some of my drink, I started again. "I..." Again it felt like the weight of the world held my words inside of me.

"I I I I I I I that's all you ever say, Sinclair. If you have something to say, just say it." Vaysh's irritation at my inability to even form sentences was completely justified. "Whatever If you can't speak what you're fighting so hard for then you aren't worth my time." He was leaving, my Vaysh was so close and he was leaving because of my inability to woo him.

"I like you!" I blurted out loud enough to where anyone could hear, thankfully we were alone in this dormitory.

"Shit? Are you serious?" Vaysh asked sitting back down and taking a bite out of the pizza. "So wait you like me like me?"

I just simply nodded at first. "Yes, since a few weeks ago when I saw that crimson hair of yours during football. I haven't been able to get you off my mind since I saw you. Could you... would you ever go out with some idiot jock who can't say his words.?"

"Well, I'll be.. I can't believe it. I had the hots for you back in freshman year but you were completely oblivious to me. Damn you're not playing, are you? You really like me and you're what, still in the closet? Or is this a prank?"

"It's not a prank, my military buddies dont know about this at all. I'm not out of the closet yet... it's a bit complicated, my parents are very ... stuck in their ways."

"Well if you truly feel that way about me. Get to know me first. I'm not just gonna drop to my knees for any guy who tells me they like me." Vayshe smirked as he started eating his meal. "I have a fencing match this afternoon, would you like to come?"

"Ya, I'd love to. I have nothing going on today. Friends wanted to play football but I am so sick of football right now."

Vaysh studied my face for a while, in total silence looking at me for any faults or weaknesses, anything that shouldn't have been there. I felt like an ant under a magnifying glass. "I feel I should make a few things clear." Vaysh started, taking a sip of his sobe before continuing. "I know who you are, I know who your family is, I know the kind of background you come from, and I don't care. Your family's money holds zero interest for me. I'm outspoken. I have some very strong opinions as you've seen. I have every intention of changing the fucking world."

I was completely blown away by him. I already really liked Vaysh, everything he was and who he was just seemed so perfect to me, and then he told me this. "Honestly, that's why I like you. I like you because you are the one person I've met who isn't after my money. When you look at me. You see me. No dollar signs. And you are certainly not one of the many many brides my parents have insisted I marry... who also looked at me like a bank account." I remember studying his face to see his reaction and was happy when he looked surprised. "I'd like to be part of your world."

"Well, we will see if you can handle my world first. It's not pretty, not everything is mansions where I come from." Vaysh started but stopped when he noticed the massive smile beaming across my face. "You are a weird one, you know that right?" Vaysh laughed a little finishing his drink. "You know that I am bi right?"

"Yes. I know you are bi, I hear the names some of the others call you."

"I'm aware of what people say about me, and I have no fucks to give. Let them talk. You suddenly start jumping to my defense, which I do not need you to do, they're going to start to wonder, and then they're going to start to whisper behind your back, and that's the last thing you want to happen."