Chapter 16 - Inside The Mind Of A Criminal

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“When it is darkest, we can see the stars.” - Ralph Waldo Emerson

3 months before the arrest of the Killer Queen

“Yes, I am on my way, Charles. Just give me 5 minutes.” An out of breath Brayleigh Connor said, struggling out of her car and hurrying towards the entrance of the Preston John’s Criminal Facility.

Another black sheep was arrested this month and considered for lifelong prison time and eventual execution.

It was a man in his 50s who brutally abused and killed young children, for years on end, only discovered now.

He was to be evaluated by a forensic therapist to determine his mental state and thus to determine his fate.

Brayleigh was considered one of the best therapists in the facility, and has worked with many inmates in her lifetime. It was an awful occupation most of the time and very saddening when she has seen them, only to come to the conclusion that they justified and rationalised what they’d done, showing no remorse.

However, there was that one rare soul who would confess and admit what they did wrong and understand why they did it. But unfortunately, it was usually too late and most of them were on death row already, and their lives ended.

This has been an inner struggle for Brayleigh for the 30 years she has been alive on this earth. Sometimes she wondered why did she even decide to pursue psychology in the first place.

Especially in criminality.
The cases were hopeless, and some terrifying.

She has thought about this once in her life, and what she considered as a possible reason for her choices, she thought back to her years with her parents and Orphanage.

Maybe it was because of her childhood wounds, that motivated her to go into the field. After all, she was born into a house full of crime and abuse. It’s possible that it’s like second nature.

That could be a probable hypothesis, since there were times where she felt so dark and twisty inside that being in close contact with criminals was all she knew and identified with. Maybe she wanted to understand their twisted psychology in order to protect herself in some way.

When she started dating Bradley, there were already signs, that she chose to ignore, indicating she was in some way manipulating him and distancing herself emotionally.

Though terrible, it made sense to her. She couldn’t find herself to trust men, or anyone in fact.

She could tell how frustrated her boyfriend became, but for the sake of keeping the peace, he just kept quiet.
Then the engagement came, and Brayleigh said yes.

From there on things were chaotic, but she didn’t want to be alone, so she decided to stuck it out. She guessed it was just how it was supposed to be.

**************

The evaluation was done and the 50-year-old Paedophile, James Lennard, was diagnosed with a sexual paraphilia, and was identified as a psychopath. What Ms Connor could find was that this man, although abused, believed what he did was right and enjoyable.

He found the whole crime as amusing, showing no regret whatsoever. It was a hopeless case, again.

He was found guilty and were to be executed in two months.

Maybe it was better that way, maybe he could now finally be free of his darkness, or be buried with it forever.
Maybe that’s what she wanted for herself too, to be free from her own demons.

****************

Later that afternoon, Brayleigh went home to her apartment, exhausted.
Another hopeless inmate, another execution scheduled.

She slid the key into the keyhole and twisted it quickly, not wasting any more time.

Upon entering, she exhaled heavily. The place was a mess.

That was nothing new, it was always a mess. Brayleigh threw down her bag unto the table, grabbed a mug and poured in the last bit of cold coffee from this morning. She didn’t mind cold coffee.

As the coffee finished pouring, she pulled out one of her favourite chairs and sunk into it gratefully.

A moment passed and just as Brayleigh was beginning to relax, a message sounded on her phone.

Due to instinct, she grabbed hold of her phone and opened up the message. It was not from someone she knew and only saw a voice note.

Who the hell is this?

She brought her finger closer to the screen and carefully pressed the play button. It said:

*Long silence*
H-h-hey, Brayleigh… it’s me…um.
I know it’s been a very long time but I thought that I owed you this message.
It’s been done.
We are finally free.
Hans and Louise, they…um…are dead. I-I…killed them. I had to do it! Before I knew it, I was there and…. I just couldn’t….
Please please, Sis, keep this between us. You owe me now. I did this for us, I know you will understand. We both wanted this, remember?
Justice is finally served.

The voice note ended and all that remained was a long and lingering silence.

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