Indulgent (EN)

Prologue

Leo

2016

Sometimes, a single moment can turn your life upside down. One step — and you're on the edge of the abyss. A flash of light, and a lifeless body falls onto the cold asphalt. One wrong turn, and death is lurking. One wrong move can change not only your fate but your very essence...

That's what happened to me.

That morning, as I left home, I had no idea everything would change. I lived in a rented apartment on the outskirts of the city — in a place so run-down, even a rat would feel cramped. Sometimes I wondered why I even ended up in Kyiv. At twenty-three, I felt that every decision I made was leading me in the wrong direction. They didn't bring happiness, didn't lead to real friends, and didn't give me any confidence about tomorrow. I was following a plan in life, but I was increasingly unsure if it was the right one.

Another long and hard day at work was coming to an end. I worked at a small software development company that had probably hired me more for my low salary than for my experience. I spent the entire day in front of a computer, buried in spreadsheets, code, and training materials. I didn't talk to my coworkers, didn't take smoke breaks, and avoided lunch breaks. I stayed late in the office, trying to absorb as much knowledge as possible in the shortest time.

By evening, I was so exhausted that I only dreamed of one thing — to get home and collapse in bed in front of yet another pointless Netflix series. Leaving the office, I climbed onto my old motorcycle, put on my helmet, and headed home. It had rained recently, and the roads were slick. Darkness was settling in, and many streetlights weren't working. I hated public transport, so after university, I bought a motorcycle, sinking into credit card debt that I still hadn't paid off.

The dark streets were nearly empty, and I decided to pick up speed. My thoughts were simple at that moment — I was debating what food to order for dinner, and buffalo wings with hot sauce seemed like a great option. Nothing philosophical, no deep reflections on the meaning of life. But then...

A black SUV sped around the corner, blinding me with its bright headlights. I lost control of the motorcycle. A sudden impact, and I was airborne. The only thing I remember is the screech of brakes and my body hitting the wet asphalt with force.

I couldn't feel my body, and there was no pain. Total disorientation. Everything around me fell silent, and I couldn't tell how much time had passed. The only thing that pierced the quiet was a voice:

"God, I hope you're alive."

It was a female voice, filled with fear and tenderness. She was trying to comfort me, but I knew her concern came more from fear for her own future than for mine. No one had cared about me for the last five years, so even this felt pleasant.

"Dad, call an ambulance!" she shouted, her hands fumbling over my body, trying to make sure nothing was broken. But I was starting to feel it — something was wrong with my leg, and pain shot through every cell of my body.

I groaned. The helmet muffled the sound, but she heard it.

"You're going to be okay. You're alive, and that's what matters," she whispered.

When I opened my eyes, I saw her face. Pale skin, huge eyes, long dark hair falling over her shoulders. She looked like an angel, surrounded by a halo of light. Maybe it was hallucinations, but she seemed as though she were woven from light.

"I'll be right back. I need to get something from the car to bandage your leg," she sobbed.

"Please don't pass out."

She left, and I was engulfed by cold and darkness. Their gripping fingers pulled me into the void, but I tried to cling to reality, to any sound, any thought. And suddenly, I overheard a conversation in the distance:

"Did you call the ambulance?"

"Amelia, get in the car. I'll call the ambulance after we leave."

"Are you kidding? Every minute could cost him his life!"

"I can't be involved in another accident! This would be the end..."

"I never thought you were a coward!"

"Don't you dare talk to me like that! He'll be fine, it's just a broken bone. He's not going to die."

"How do you know? I didn't realize you had a medical degree."

"Amelia..."

I heard the car door slam and footsteps, pulling me back to life. The girl returned, as promised.

"You have a broken leg. I'm no doctor, but it's sticking out the wrong way, so it's definitely broken," she said, kneeling beside me. "I'm going to bandage it so you don't bleed out before help arrives. Don't move, please."

Her hands trembled as she gently slipped the cloth under my thigh. She acted confidently despite the fear. I thought she seemed far more composed than I was at that moment.

"My dad's an idiot," she whispered. "I called the ambulance, so hopefully, you won't die. If you do... well, that would be a real mess."

I tried to smile. My angel — a foul-mouthed one, but still a light in the darkness.

"You should become a doctor," I managed to say.

She leaned closer to hear me better.

"Sorry, but I'm not sure we should remove your helmet. You might have a neck injury... better wait for the medics."

With the last of my strength, I said louder, "I said, you should become a doctor."

"Oh," was all she replied before falling silent.

"Are you done playing Mother Teresa?" her father's nervous voice rang out. "We need to go."

"We're not going anywhere because I've already called the ambulance and the police."

"What did you do?!"

"I said I called..."

I heard hurried footsteps, and then someone — probably her father — yanked the girl by the arm.

"What the hell are you doing?! You know I could go to jail for driving drunk?!"

"I told you not to drive! I warned you!"

With incredible effort, I turned my head to see what was happening. A huge man was dragging my angel to the car, roughly shoving her into the back seat. She resisted, crying, but she was too small and fragile to fight against such a giant. He was wearing a suit that didn't hide his enormous belly, bald with greasy folds on his neck. She definitely didn't take after her father.

He never glanced in my direction, and I didn't try to get a good look at him either. All I was looking for were her eyes, to remember them for the rest of my life. She peeked out of the window, her gaze piercing me, and though she couldn't see my face, I stared at her, memorizing every feature. Horror, fear, anger, disgust — it all blended on her face. She was powerless, like so many angels in a world ruled by men like her father.

The car's engine roared, swerved around me like I was trash, and sped off into the night. Her gaze stayed with me even as I closed my eyes and slipped into oblivion.