Angst

Chapter 1#

If u feel uncomfortable reading this plz click off I don't want to make u uncomfortable.

MIGHT CONTIAN:Depression, Uncomfortable thoughts,and Sudicial and other stuff that is bad or scary.

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A thing I'm struggling with is my Sudicial thoughts.I have a habit or tend too idk but its having Sudicial thoughts everyday.Some of these thoughts would be me wanting to die or imagine my death or how will I want to die rn or I plan my death and have myself repeat it over and over again so I can really want to kill myself doesn't make sense but idk how to explain it but here's some thoughts I get.

"why can't I die?"

"God I don't wanna live anymore"

"I'm going to kill myself today"

"I'm tired to live..."

"Just let me die God!"

"I'm gonna kill myself with the knife"

"When I get older I will kill myself prob at 15"

"I wanna kill myself rn!"

There are way more but they are more deeper

And Idk who to talk too..I'm supposed to be a Christian girl?!I go to church I shouldn't be having these thoughts and if I do I should talk to Pastor abt it..But I can't idk why it feels like there's something preventing me to talking to anyone abt it.And I don't want to tell anyone cuz it will make me feel like I'm crazy and I don't know of they will sent me to a Mental hospital... I wanted to talk to a Therapist but how??..I'm young..I'm only (##).

I need to cover up my thoughts pretend I'm happy pretend nothings wrong pretend I'm perfectly fine!

I really don't wanna live...

It's short and I wanted to write more but knowing myself when it comes to writing abt my life it gets pretty long so yea..

Anyway try for reading Chapter 1#

Love u pookies😁