I'm about to leave for school. I'm dreading it, the smirks, the looks, the comments. I plan what I will do but everything backfires. Everyday it gets worse and the pain gets stronger and I feel weaker and I don't know what to do. I walk alone because we cannot afford a car and there is no bus stop near us. When I reach my school (Oklahoma secondary academy) I just find a quiet bench to sit on, sad I know, but what else do I do? There is one thing that makes me happy, that is reading. My favourite ever book that I could read any day is "Freestyle fantastic", I could read it a million and one times. It is about a 15 year old girl who is a talented beautiful fierce freestyle disco dancer who has an incredible story. Oh how I long to be like her. She has friends! Fun! And the ability to reach her dream! One thing I do know is that I will never EVER be like that. And that brings me back to sadness. If you think about it, it is like self harming. You hurt yourself because your sad and then it hurts but then you do it again to make the pain go away. But for me that's reading, I read, then I'm sad, so I read it again to make the sadness go away.
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Thanks for reading this! I'm sorry if the self harm is to much for some of you, I did not do it to be offensive in any way. It is just for the story. If you are like the girl in the story, speak up! Be heard! Sometimes it's just a talk that can make things better! :-) just give me a message!
