Love In Lies | Dazai x Sigma | (Fyodor x Nikolai)

1. A New Mission

Dazai's Pov:

-

If someone were to ask me, "Dazai, what's your favorite part of your job at the Armed Detective Agency?" my answer would be:

Quitting time. By far.

And today was no different:

With an exaggeratedly long sigh, I flopped onto the (more or less) comfortable couch in the agency's office like a sack of wet potatoes.

Oh man... everything hurt, and even my bruises had bruises.

I scooted like a seal to the end of the couch, where I buried my face into the cushion with yet another, way-too-loud sigh, ready to fall asleep on the spot.

If I could, I'd unload all my troubles on someone right now... preferably Kunikida, or maybe Yosano, or even Ranpo or Fukuzawa.

I wouldn't dream of burdening Kenji with it; the kid was already stressed out and overwhelmed with his many missions, though he'd never admit it outright.

But right now, I was too tired to do anything at all! Too tired to even pull my headphones out from under the sofa, along with my MP3 player, to pick some random, meaningless songs.

Yeah, I was even too tired to fish around for any leftover chips in the couch crack that Ranpo (to the best of his eagle-eyed ability) had forgotten to finish off within half a second...

Which wouldn't have been out of character for his messiness, something Kunikida, along with Fukuzawa, had already lectured him about multiple times.

But I didn't care about that now, even though I'd normally jump at any chance for food.

All I wanted right now was peace.

My joints felt like someone had taken them apart just to haphazardly reattach them with a handful of spit and superglue.

First the Port Mafia... Kunikida's lectures... a fight... Ranpo's complaints and know-it-all remarks... another fight... Akutagawa, who seemed to have no self-restraint, especially when it came to ripping me apart in battle... a fight... the fact that one building nearly buried me beneath it, almost making my funeral sadder and more pathetic than I had anticipated... and, oh yeah...

...A fight.

No, no, no, you could toss me right into the garbage today...

I was determined that if anyone, and I mean anyone, interrupted my attempt to drift off into the sweet world of dreams and rob me of my well-deserved sleep, I'd personally throw them out the window...

...Although...

...As I lay there, slipping further into an endless void devoid of feelings and worries, I knew deep down that if someone did come in, I'd just stay lying on this couch.

My feet were sweating in my shoes, and honestly, I was feeling pretty hot in my clothes, especially with my coat still on.

The late summer evening heat had turned the office into an incubator.

Even the feeble little fan next to the couch was useless at this point; I'd completely tuned out its droning, and I knew from experience that opening the window would only make it worse.

Still, I didn't care about anything right now... I was just enjoying the quiet... and the peace...

"D-Dazai?"

Okay, that was it.

It was as if I'd been jerked out of the world of silence and inner peace, back into cold, merciless reality.