Ink & Intentions (Lingorm)

15. Avoiding her

Ling felt the tension every time she crossed paths with Orm, even briefly, around the apartment. Since the night of the kiss, she'd started finding excuses to stay out longer and spend more time on her own. She immersed herself in anything to keep her mind busy: study groups, projects, and hours at the campus cafe with Wisanu.

She hoped it would be enough to drown out the memory of that night. Yet each time she saw Orm's familiar smile, something inside her twisted—a mix of guilt and a longing she couldn't admit to herself.

Orm had noticed the distance. Ling saw it in the subtle way Orm's eyes clouded when she walked into a room, the way she'd trail off mid-sentence as if wondering what she'd done wrong. But Ling couldn't face that night yet; her emotions were too knotted to make sense of. Every time she remembered the way Orm's lips had pressed against hers, soft and unguarded, a flush would rise in her cheeks, followed quickly by a pang of confusion. She barely understood it herself—how could she explain it to Orm?

After almost a week of avoidance, Ling couldn't take it any longer. She reached out to Bow and Tan, asking them to meet her at their favorite cafe. She needed her friends, needed someone who'd listen without judgment and help her untangle her thoughts.

Once they were settled at a corner table, Bow immediately sensed Ling's distraction. She leaned forward, studying Ling with a concerned look. "Ling, what's going on? You've been so out of it lately."

Tan gave her an encouraging nudge. "Yeah, this doesn't seem like just school stress. Spill."

Ling hesitated, tracing her finger along the rim of her coffee cup. She took a deep breath, her voice barely above a whisper. "There... was a kiss."

Both Bow and Tan stared at her, eyes wide with surprise.

"With Wisanu?" Tan guessed, confusion flickering across his face.

Ling shook her head, cheeks burning. "No. Not Wisanu. It was... it was Orm."

A stunned silence settled between them as Bow and Tan absorbed her words. Finally, Bow's eyes widened with a mix of excitement and confusion. "Wait... Orm kissed you?"

Ling nodded, feeling her cheeks flush. "It was... mutual, kind of? She was really drunk that night, and Ying brought her home. We were talking, and she started asking me these strange questions, like if I'd kissed Wisanu yet. And then... she kissed me. I didn't even react at first—I was too shocked."

Tan leaned in closer, captivated. "And what did you do?"

Ling's voice dropped, her gaze fixed on her coffee. "I... kissed her back. Just for a moment. Then I freaked out and pulled away. She fell asleep right after, and I haven't talked to her about it since."

Bow reached out, placing a reassuring hand on Ling's arm. "So, you're avoiding her because...?"

Ling's shoulders slumped. "Because I don't know what it meant. I don't know how she feels, and I'm not even sure how I feel. Every time I think about it, my heart starts racing, and it's like... it's like I can't breathe."

Tan looked at her sympathetically. "So, you're spending all this time with Wisanu to avoid facing what's going on with Orm?"

Ling nodded, guilt clouding her expression. "I know it's not fair to Wisanu, or to Orm. But I don't know how to handle this. What if I bring it up, and she doesn't remember? Or worse... what if she does, but it didn't mean anything to her?"

Bow gave her a firm look. "Ling, running away from it isn't going to help. Sooner or later, you're going to have to talk to her. Otherwise, you'll just end up hurting her—and yourself—more."

Ling's heart sank, knowing Bow was right. But she wasn't ready yet. Facing Orm now, while her heart was still tangled and uncertain, was too terrifying. For now, distance felt like the only way to protect them both.

Ling tried to maintain that distance over the next few days. She filled her time with study sessions, library visits, and extra hours with Wisanu. When Orm tried to catch her eye, Ling would busy herself with her phone or make an excuse to be somewhere else. But it was impossible to ignore the dull ache in her chest whenever Orm's face lit up with confusion or hurt.

And then, one evening, as Ling left the library with Wisanu, she glanced across the courtyard and saw Orm walking with Ying, laughing about something only they understood. Orm's laugh was warm, carefree, a reminder of the friend Ling had always known. She looked happy—happier, maybe, than Ling had felt in a long time. Seeing them together only deepened the confusion swirling in her heart.

It was easier to keep her distance, she told herself. Easier to focus on Wisanu and pretend the kiss had been a mistake, a drunken impulse. But even as she walked away with him, she couldn't shake the memory of Orm's gaze that night, the way her lips had lingered, soft and filled with something Ling didn't dare name.

The distance continued to grow, but the feelings didn't fade—they only deepened, a tension pulling Ling further from certainty and closer to something she couldn't ignore.