Beyond Belief: My Insightful Exploration of Islam

My message to all who read this: please know that I’m not here to challenge anyone’s faith or beliefs. I’m simply sharing my journey and my perspective in the hope that it might offer knowledge or insight. Please don’t judge without understanding.

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I am a student born into a Muslim family. While being  Muslim that doesn't necessarily mean I practice Islam(religion) , my parents encourage me to follow it. However, I haven’t embraced the practice yet.

As time passes, I grow and learn from various experiences in life. There are moments of joy, and sometimes, there are challenges. When hardships come my way, I often wonder, why is this happening to me? I used to feel like I was the only one facing such struggles and had many questions and complaints about it.

I often find myself wondering why these issues exist. Why should I have to face them? When I ask others, their responses rarely satisfy me. Even if someone tries to stop me from doing something, I don’t feel they have a real reason. Sometimes the older ones often advise me about many things, but in the end, they don’t follow their own advice—they just push it on me. So, I lived life as I wished, until one day, something changed.

In December 2021, I was in class 10. As a Muslim, I have to pray five times a day. But since the first prayer is at dawn, I often miss it because I’m asleep. However, one day I suddenly woke up at that time, and the azan (call for prayer) was happening. So, I got out of bed and prayed that salah (prayer).

After praying, I stayed on the prayer mat, feeling a profound peace that made me want to remain there forever. I didn’t know what it was, but I longed to understand it. Though I couldn’t find the answer, I didn’t stop praying. To feel that peace every day, I began praying all my prayers consistently, without missing any. I still don’t know what awaits me next.

Then, in September or October of 2022, I came across some videos and shorts on YouTube about why Muslims (those who accept Islam as their religion) pray. I remember the videos were by Nouman Ali Khan, who explained everything so well that anyone could understand. After watching the videos, I understand the concept of why I should pray. Praying 5 times a day helps to remove stress , it's like a meditation and it keeps my relationship well with my creator. That's why we pray. I felt guilty because I had not known this before. That's why I  blamed people who misrepresent Islam or don’t live up to it properly. I kept complaining and judging others, even though I was no different from them. Later, around the end of February 2023, I came to a conclusion.

I used to be a huge fan of romantic stories, spending countless hours watching and reading romantic dramas, movies, mangas, and more—many of which included scenes like kissing, hugging, and other things that are forbidden in Islam. I should have avoided them, but I didn’t, because I enjoyed them so much and thought that Islam had no place for romance.

But then I came to understand that Islam has its own beautiful perspective on love and romance. I was honestly shocked, as I had never known this before. On a typical day, while scrolling on YouTube, I stumbled upon something new—a video sharing the love story of Adam, the first human and prophet, and Eve (Hawwa), the first woman. It opened my eyes to a beautiful side of romance within Islam that I hadn’t known before.

The story was profound, but the part that touched me the most was at the end: when Adam (peace be upon him) was nearing his death, Eve (peace be upon her) was heartbroken and in tears. Adam comforted her by reminding her of Allah’s mercy and the promise of reunion in the Hereafter. He consoled her with words of patience and trust in Allah’s plan, reassuring her that death is a part of life’s journey and that they would be together again in Paradise, just as Allah had promised.

It means they truly would be together again, because this life is not the end of our story. One day will surely come when everything will be renewed, and for those who believed, lived by this truth, and held onto it, we are promised an everlasting Paradise.

I had never known these things before that day. Since then, I have continued discovering things I never knew, and each one has surprised me even more. I feel a deep regret for not realizing this sooner; it saddened me and filled me with guilt. But now, I know what my religion teaches me and what the Quran—the holy book of Islam, revealed by Allah to the Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him) as a complete and final guide for humanity—says about this.