Constellations of Desire

3

Sofia

From the age of fourteen, when I found out that I liked both men and woman, I've made it my lifes mission to see how fucked up I can get with sex. How far my boundaries can go with BDSM, how long my breath can be held when I'm being chocked and all that fucked up shite. Yes I was a wild explorer when I was young.

With woman I went for ones who were always older than me cause let's be honest older woman know what they want and what they want is heaven. But the ages were near my own like maybe six or seven years apart. When I started sleeping around I was fourteen? fifteen?Yeah fifteen, back then I was experimenting, but still older girls but two years but now, I go for the woman in their mid and late twenties. Ya know causes I'm fruity like that.

With men same thing but... no goody two shoes or gentleman. If I got a man to send a fucking shiver down my spine I know I'll have shaking legs but men never got me there cause, well I don't do one on ones. Two guy or a guy and a girl.  That's my roll, above that fucking epic bellow that... It's then sex not fucking and also guys don't shiver me so much, no one has made me fall to my knees yet or made my skin trickle by a simple stare and no man will.

Same with woman.

But I'm offended, lost of guys and I mean ninety nine percent of them, when I start kissing their necks, trailing my hand down their torsos, I'm already being stripped.... But wine tasting asshole didn't budge, I didn't even see his eyes shudder, his pulse didn't pick up or nothing.

It made me - for the first time in my life - question myself. It made me mad, turned-on, flustered, humiliated and all the good and bad things all at once. So I did what I always do, I called up my recent fuck buddies, two guys and and girl.

Erik, Ian and Venus. I met Erik and Ian at a party last month they're friends, freaky friends and Venus I met at another party but this was a freaky party. IFYKYK. Anyway the three seem to jump at my texts every time and they arrive within minutes.

In those minutes, the hunt as the posh country club said it ended, we gained three new people. All guys and my god, if they could walk perfectly I'd fuck them but at the moment they're in the living room being given a speech.

When the three arrive, we get into it, no foreplay, no teasing, no nothing and for the life of me... I can't enjoy it. Even as I'm ontop, underneath, being eaten out, getting manhandled... I just lay there, I stare at the ceiling, lost in my own thoughts about shite like why couldn't I get pizza crust to do anything? Why wouldn't he fuck me? I've had Italian guys before and let's be honest, a different breed. He was polite when he pushed me back, I didn't want fucking polite, I wanted to be used, mutilated and illegally fucked.

I need hel-

The fuck I do.

I'm perfectly fine!

See what that pizza crust wine tasting vineyard fucker is doing to me. It leads to me pushing Ian off of me, I roll off the bed, grabbing a pair of silk shorts from my chair I slip them on and a sports bra as well before leaving the room. The three entertainment themselves which I have no problem with. If I not in the mood, I won't stop them... I'll just kick them out when they're done.

I enter the living rooms and fall onto the couch beside Alexander. My bestest friend, my brother from a totally different race, guy who I've never fucked and never will - not that he ever will of course. Ever since the fourth grade when I met Alexander, I've enjoy being around him, he laughed at the shite I said and above all he wanted to be *my* friend not my name's friend. I lean my head on his shoulder and he rests his head on mine.

"Should I get Gray ready to take care of the flousies upstairs?" He asks exhaustion clear in his voice.

"Nah, they're still fucking" i reply as my I start pulling at the skin of my nails subconsciously, he shoves my hands aside silently telling me to quit it.