If Only | Short Story

If Only

~June, 2011~

Her head falls against his shoulder. "If only we could always live like this. If only we could always live like when we first fell in love."

He squeezes her shoulder gently, laughing slightly. "If only."

***

~August, 2014~

"Harley. Harley?" Her voice echoes through the otherwise empty house. She rubs her stomach and goes back to bed. Maybe he's just getting a glass of water and he'll come back to bed soon. She shifts under the blankets. It's cold without Harley next to her.

***

"Harley."

"Hmm?" He leans is head against her chest. She grins as he looks up sleepily.

"I thought you were asleep." She whispers. He grunts in response. He brings his head up to kiss her forehead. She giggles. "You're cute when you're sleepy."

"Really?" He murmurs, his eyelids drooping. His hand wiggles around until it finds hers. He clutches it and gives it a little kiss. She puts her hand on his clothed chest. Her hand is cold. He flinched and flips over, away from her. She pouts, tracing her finger down his jawline. He bats her hand away, suddenly remembering something. He quickly slips his shirt on, grabs his shoes and keys, and slams the door behind him.

***

"Harley? Where were you?" She calls, rubbing her eyes a little. He slips into bed, but he doesn't have the same comforting smell that he usually does. He tenses for a moment as she wraps an arm around him.

"I was..." He remembers that he stopped and grabbed ice cream for her on the way home. "...grabbing that ice cream you wanted."

She smiles against her pillow. He smiles back. He turns on his side. A thing of lipstick falls out of his pocket. She picks it up. "Why do you have lipstick?" She asks, her words slurring together from tiredness. He grabs it back.

"It's also for you." He lies. He slowly puts it back in her palm, closing her hand around it. She's silent for a few minutes.

"Harley?" She asks again. He turns to look at her almost-asleep, dark form. "Why do you smell like perfume?"

He tenses again. "The store must've smelled funny." He lies again. She just closes her eyes and drifts off. He tries to do the same, but can't sleep with her arm on him.

***

~January, 2017~

He gives her a small hug, gently kissing her cheek before hurrying away. She runs after him.

"What's wrong?" She asks, stopping him by putting her hand on his chest. She tries to kiss his cheek back, but he jerks away, leaving a lipstick stain on his face. She stands in front of him again. "What's wrong?" She demands. He doesn't answer, instead turning the other way and leaving. She stands there, gawking after him.

***

"Daddy!" A little toddler with white-blonde hair comes running to him. Harley scoops him up in his arms.

"J!" He hugs the little boy close. She walks up, too, smiling thinly.

"Hello, Harley. How was 'grocery shopping?'" She asks drily. He raises an eyebrow, but James grabs his nose before he can respond. He's thankful in a way. He has no words that he could think of to use, anyway.

"Gentle, bud." He laughs vainly as he pulls his son's hand away.

"How was 'grocery shopping?'" She repeats, firmer this time. She steps closer, but doesn't give him a kiss like she always does when he gets home. He puts James down.