New Life

Chapter 9

David's Pov-
(Suprise!)

I don't like myself sometimes. Like I really hate myself.

I'm so stupid, so so stupid.

I shouldn't have said all those things... I'm so stupid.

But it is her fault though. She could have done something about that.

She was 10.

Well, yeah, but at 10 I would have...

No you wouldn't. You would have been just as helpless.

I- your right I guess.

But I have a right to be mad-

No I don't. I had no right to call her a bitch. I had no right to say I wish she was dead. I had no right to yell at her and tell her it was all her fault...

And the fact that she didn't even fight back shows that she already thought these things and I made it worse...

Oh shit.

Fuck.

But I can't think about that right to now. Right now I need to check those damn security cameras.

I know I shouldn't have gotten drunk 3 nights ago, but I was overwhelmed, and the best way to fix that is to just not think about it, or anything for that matter, for the next couple of hours.

I walk out of the meeting room as James calls an end to it, and I walk across the way to the security room.

I sit in one of the chairs, and I turn my screen away from prying eyes, aka, the 3 guards that watch over the security room.

Then I, as discreetly as possible, connect a cord between my laptop and the computer beside me.

Aaaand done.

I got all of the camera feed since Friday morning.

Friday afternoon Allison got to our house, and at first I just kinda of sat in those feelings, but after dinner that night, I went out and got drunk in order to forget everything.

Well, it didn't even work because the second I saw her again, those feelings all came back in a wave of emotion.

Anyways. I stand up and walk as seemingly calmly as possible out the door, down a flight of stairs, successfully, without meeting anyone.

I reach for the handle of my room, when a hand taps me on the shoulder.

"Yes?" I ask without turning around to look at them.

"David, can we talk?" It's Michael.

I love the kid. After Allison was taken, Michael and I bonded, we grew closer with similar interests and mentalities.

The one things that was never similar was our emotions.

Michael is... exceptional. He is an amazing 3rd in command, he's brilliant, he's hardworking, he rarely complains or argues... but Michael and I are not the same person.

And the truth is, he has to be somehow like his twin, because they are so close. But the thing that they are similar with, is their emotions.

Nate is all about expressing what you feel, at the appropriate time, he's also very sympathetic.

Michael is kinda like that. He is good at concealing, but not great.

But, because we are the closest, instead of turning to his twin when he needs advice, he turns to me... one of the worst people to ask about feelings.