Will x sukuna best friends kindergarden trope

Seine isn't the only thing full of shit

Will had a good day today. He got up early, finished a commission and got paid ¥69 000 for it. That is the currency in France, where he spent most of his time. He despised the French (as most sane people do), but had to admit that they're rich due to their exploitative history.

His work consisted of drawing baguettes for the pigeon citizens of Paris and portraits of absolute monarchs to egotistical aristocrats that wanted to imagine themselves as even bigger pieces of shit than they already were.

One of those aristocrats was named Sukuna IbarelyKnoHa. He was the richest person currently living in Paris and lived in a giant mansion. However, he lived all on his own as he ate all of his previous suitors and employees. His family left in fear of getting eaten long ago, so he's been raising himself since before he could remember.

Sukuna was a tall man that refused to wear a shirt and anyone who tried to shield their eyes from his massive pectorals was executed on the spot. He really fit in with the French, though he didn't speak their language.

Anyway, Will was taking a casual stroll along the Seine, careful not to slip and fall into the extremely polluted river. There had been some close calls, but luckily no shit water managed to touch his pearly white skin. Suddenly, he got a notification on his iPad while he was playing genshin and saw that it was another commission.

"A Mr. Sukondeeznuts? Who could that possibly be?" Will scratched his raccoon tail hair and looked at the details of the commission.

"More furry porn? This one's a raccoon and a dragon.. what the fuck? How does that even work?" The people of France always demanded furry porn which meant that was his best seller. "Money is money.." Will muttered and got started on drawing the ridiculous furry porn in public along the Seine. How romantic.

It started to rain, which was to be expected in a country as shitty as France, so Will decided to move into a cafe to finish his artwork. It was a remote library/cafe run by a sweet grandma, which almost had a heart attack on the spot when she sneaked a peeked at what he was drawing.

"Yeah can I have one ice hot Frappuccino with extra no foam caramel drizzle with a cherry on top and ice cream in the middle, no sugar, no calories, no water, no coffee, no air and extra sugar?" Will asked the traumatised grandma next to him. She nodded, took off her apron, and started doing cartwheels in the rain until a car ran poor Gertrude over.

"Typical..." Will muttered and went back to his furry gay porn. He was in the middle of drawing the dragon's balls while whispering enchantments under his breath until he felt a strong presence behind him.

"Drawing gay furry porn all by yourself handsome?" Sukuna IbarelyKnoHa smirked down at him while puffing out his chest. Will promptly looked at him and continued working on his artwork. Sukuna's executors got their guillotine ready but Sukuna waved them off. They stared at their master, confused, but ultimately obeyed and bowed their head before using the guillotine on an unlucky branch outside.

'How intriguing... he is not at all in awe of my beautiful pectorals and remains unbothered by my presence. I must wow him.' Sukuna thought and thought of a diabolical plan.

"I see you're working on my commission.. how about I pay you quintuple the amount I owe if you come home with me? We can recreate the drawing" he bellowed while Will stared at him in bewilderment.

"You're.. Sukundeeznuts?" He inquired while looking between him and his heavily edited tumblr profile picture. Sukuna was only 2m tall, while his profile stated it was actually 5m. His profile picture showed him with a heavy blush, cat ears and whiskers, and yet they were nowhere to be seen in real life. His pecks were also shown as bigger in the profile picture and yet his were a joke compared to them.

"Yes, it is I, Sukundeeznuts. Pleased to make your acquaintance" he bowed and kissed Will's hand while accidentally swallowing his ring and choking on it.

"Ehehehehehe sorry, they're kind of loose 🥰. I lost weight if you hadn't noticed yet" he rolled his eyes and began walking out of the cafe with his bootyliscious gyatt breaking a few pillars and almost destroying the cafe.

"Wait! I'll.... Find your will to live" Sukuna pathetically reached his muscly arm towards will as a feeble attempt to stop him.

"What... did you say?"