I decided to do a Write My Life bc why not c: I don't have many followers, but I'm getting more and more reads on Three Months To Prove You Wrong, so thanks so much! Without further a do, let's start my Write My Life.
I was born on November 14, 2000 in Mesa, Arizona under my parents Jeff and Victoria. I had huge blue eyes and thick dark hair after I popped out fresh from the womb. My dad was like, "she lukz liek an chloe lulz." so that's how they named me. Yeah, pretty boring, I know. I was their first baby, then came along MY SISTER. She's annoying, but we've got each other's backs. I also have a dog named Lady, and I love her to death. She's really derpy and needy, but our family still adores her.
As a kid, I was always happy-go-lucky and extremely hyper (but every kid is when they're 4-7 years old). I loved music and video games and beauty. I remember going to one of my babysitter's house when I was around five or six and playing Mario and Kirby games and watching Teen Titans. Everyone thought I was weird in elementary school. BUT DID THAT STOP ME? HAIL NO! I was just a free-spirit and carefree, so I never understood the world. Everything was going okay, until 3rd grade approached.
I was having some issues with friendships and fitting in, so I started pulling out my eyebrows and eyelashes. I didn't know why I did it, but it was relieving and calming to me, so I did. I'd always have gaps in my eyelashes and eyebrows, and a couple kids noticed. I was always considered a nobody to the rest of everyone, know one really seemed to care about me. Later in 3rd grade, I was diagnosed with trichotillomania. I'd go to therapy sessions and talk about it, take medicine, and do weird stuff with my fingers to prevent me from pulling, like wearing gloves or taping my fingers. I finally recovered, and now I NEED to pluck my eyebrows cuz they NAS-TAY.
Anyway, when 4th grade rolled around, I have had enough. "I was going to be popular and everyone will like me." I would say to myself. Now that I look back at it, I would think, "omg ur like 9 shaddup." But it really bothered me that no one seemed to care about my pink frilly outfits. I have been a tomboy all my life and I was trying to be someone that I'm not.
5th grade rolled in, and I tried again to be popular. AND WHAT DO YOU KNOW I FAILED ONCE AGAIN LULULULUL. But this time, I was the complete opposite. I wore the same pink Aéropostale jacket every single day and obsessed over anime and cosplay too much, I was practically a weeaboo.
When 6th grade came, I just gave up. I knew it failed twice so why bother? I was actually really happy (for the first couple months) and people actually started to take notice! I then started to stop caring what I looked like. I wore baggy shirts, basketball shorts, and my dark wavy hair in a low bun everyday. My mom told me to start putting some effort into my clothing choice, so I did, and it took a wrong turn -_-" I entered...
THE EMO/SCENE PHASE
*gasps in the background*
*children crying*
Yeah, it was horrid.
I had stupid fringe with stupid BOTDF shirts with stupid raccoon/panda makeup with stupid music taste and STUPID EVERYTHING.
AND IT CONTINUED ON THROUGH 7TH GRADE.
OH LAWD.
And that's when I started dying my bangs blue, purple, pink, galaxy, fire Phoenix, clear, blond, black, red white and blue, MY HAIR WAS A RAINBOW.
Okay, let's get a little more serious.
I also starting going out with my first boyfriend and it lasted 7 months, sooooo that kinda tells you I suck at relationships. I was also really sad and depressed but i didnt know why. I started up a self-harm addiction and kept everything to myself. Then me and my boyfriend at the time broke up and it felt like a huge shank in the stomach with a double edged sword. I didn't bother to do fun summer activities or anything. I just sat around on Netflix stuffing myself with Hot Cheetos and pizza while and watching Outlast gameplay. I was really depressed during middle school, and that's all I remember of it. Every time I think about it, all my brain could say is, "Ech, ew gross, nasty." It was not at all as I expected.
8th grade also sucked. I was sexually confused, went out with four people (and that lasted like two weeks), and I always had panic attacks. And most of them were at school. People thought I did it for attention, but why would I risk hitting my head on concrete and suffering brain damage for attention? That's when my depression hit an all time high. I lost color in my face, I was beginning to look really pale, my hunger was like a roller coaster; I'd either eat one meal a day or binge eat on everything. I had really bad self harm problems, and I thought I was going insane. I felt nothing, and I felt so empty. Every little thing that would make me sad turned into a big commotion. My parents had enough, and decided to get me some help. I went to a psychiatrist in mid-February 2015 and was officially diagnose with depressive disorder and panic disorder. Two months later I was put on medication: fluoxetine, aka, Prozac. And I will tell you that medication is a life saver. Of course, the side effects came with it, such as fatigue and migraines, but it took me a couple weeks and I was on the right track. I started to become more happier and started appreciating the little things in life, no matter what it was. Surprisingly, with high school starting, it's going really well! I haven't had any thoughts of depression or anxiety (needless to say self harm), so my life is going really well! And I'm happy to be a writer and a musician, because I found that music and writing your feelings out really helps. Thanks for reading, and I'll see you in my next update for Three Months To Prove You Wrong. Bye guys c: ❤️
