The Ties that Bind [ON-GOING]

10

Nagising ako sa umaga nang nahihilo at tumatakbo papunta sa banyo para magduwal.

I have something in mind. But —I don't want to believe it.... This is not the right time for this.

I badly need someone vent out.

Positive.

Iyan ang unang bungad ng pregnancy test sa'kin na nagpayanig sa'king umaga.

Ilang araw na akong nakaramdam ng pagkahilo at pagsusuka. Mapili din ako sa pagkain at palaging masungit. I also don't like other people scent. It's disgusting, and I'm going to throw up anytime if I'm inhaling their scent. Siguro yon na ang sintomas nang pagbubuntis ko.

Hindi ako nagdalawang isip na magpabili sa pinsan ko ng pregnancy test.

She's so confuse when I said it to her.

"Cous, can you buy me a PT?" malumanay na sabi ko.

Kagagaling lang ako sa pagsuka kaya medyo nawalan ako ng gana. I called her after what happened.

I have a morning sickness again. It's suck.

"What's PT?" nagtatakang tanong niya. Medyo mahina ang boses niya.

Naririnig ko sa kabilang linya ang mga taong nagdedebati. Ang ingay, para silang nasa palengke. Nasa eskwela pa ata siya.

"Uh-maybe I just tell you nalang later after your class. Naistorbo pa ata kita. " may paumanhing sabi ko. Mukang na istorbo ko ata siya sa klase niya.

"No, it's okay. You can tell me now. My classmates are just playing and joking around, wala pa naman ang Prof." sabi niya at tumawa pa ng konti. Natatawa ata siya sa mga kaklase niya.

"Oh-okay.... Can you buy me a— pregnancy test?"

"Why?! What!?Are you-" hindi ko na pinatapos ang sinabi niya at sinagot ko na agad.

"I'm—yeah? No? Maybe? I don't know. The PT can say if it's negative or positive." mangiyak ngiyak na sabi ko.

I really want to cry. I already called my friend and tell them what happen to me, and what I'm feeling right now and I'm happy that they comforted me but sadly they're not here in the Philippines. They're outside the country. They said that even if they want to be here with me in this kind of state but they just can't because they're with their parents.

I badly want to talk someone right now. And I'm thankful that I have my cousin, Kirlstine.

"Where are you?" she ask. Hindi ko na narinig ang mga ingay. Lumabas ata siya sa classroom nila.

"I'm in my condo. Can you come here?" nandito lang ako sa couch naka upo at nakatulala. Medyo nanginginig ang mga kamay ko dahil sa sobrang kaba. I can feel my cold hand sweating.

I don't know what I'm feeling right now. My parents would be mad at me, especially my mom. I'm sure of that.

"Okay... just wait me their. I'm coming. Just stay calm okay? Don't do stupid things Athena."

"What about your class?" nababahalang tanong ko.

I don't want tita cely would be mad to her just because she skip class. Strict pa naman yon kagaya ni mommy. Kambal nga talaga sila, walang duda.

"Don't worry. Class can wait. They can start even without me. Hindi ako mapapagalitan kung hindi ka rin magsusumbong." may halong tawa pa ang huli niyang sinabi.