Me and my Husband| YEONBIN TXT

Chapter- 20

A chill spreads through Yeonjun's body, starting from his neck and pooling in his underarms. He touches his stomach with flat hands, then presses his fingernails in deep. He scratches and scratches at his abdomen, whimpering, until he draws blood. The sight of the droplets bubbling up against the surface of his skin, chromatic and viscous, stops his breath.

There's something inside him, sharing his blood.

He snatches his phone and calls the only person he thinks would understand.

"Hello?"

"Beomgyu," Yeonjun whispers, his voice shaking. He glances at his own reflection in the mirror — his face is white, as if there's no blood in it. "Can you come over? It's an emergency."

"What's going on?" Beomgyu asks.

"I— I'm—" Yeonjun can't say it. "Please, just come over."

"Give me fifteen minutes."

In those fifteen minutes, Yeonjun manages to exit the bathroom. He curls up in the couch, burying his face against his knees. A baby. There is a baby inside him. A baby that will love him, that will grip his pinky finger with its tiny hand, that will look at him with the entire world in its eyes. That will smile at him, all gums and round cheeks.

That will drool all over him, spit up on him, that will scream all night. That will drink from his body like it's nothing more than a resource, that will steal his sleep, his health, his body, his mind, his freedom. It will secure him to Juwon like a pair of handcuffs. It will lock him inside his home. This thing will eat his life.

Beomgyu knocks at the door, and Yeonjun answers without speaking.

"What happened?"

Yeonjun still can't say it, so he leads Beomgyu to the bathroom and shows him the tests.

Beomgyu smiles, but it's more polite than anything. "This is a good thing, right?"
Yeonjun squeezes his eyes shut, pushing out tears.

"Oh," Beomgyu says, taking Yeonjun into his arms. He cups the back of Yeonjun's skull with his hand. "I'm so sorry."

Yeonjun whimpers against Beomgyu, the sound high and strident. It's not a noise Yeonjun's ever heard himself make.

"It's okay, it's okay," Beomgyu says.

"I can't keep it," Yeonjun says.

Beomgyu huffs. "Yeah. Okay, let's go sit down."

On the couch, Yeonjun still can't fully detach himself from Beomgyu. He grips onto his forearms, staring down at the white couch. How can they have a white couch with a baby? It's going to vomit and shit all over it.

"Whatever you want to do, I'm behind you," Beomgyu says. "But I don't understand. Weren't you and your husband trying for a baby?"

"He was," Yeonjun sniffs. "But I've been taking birth control behind his back."

"Oh."

Yeonjun peaks up at Beomgyu's face; his eyes wide with surprise, the rest of his face smooth as a placid lake. Is Beomgyu judging him? Is this how Beomgyu feels all the time, on the other side of Yeonjun's gaze?

"Why didn't you tell him that you don't want a baby?" Beomgyu asks.

"Because he wants a baby."

Beomgyu takes a deep breath, hugs Yeonjun again.

Muffled against Beomgyu's sweatshitr, Yeonjun mumbles, "I need to get an abortion."

"Okay. Let's go to the OBGYN. Let's go together."