nepenthe; l.h

Chapter 1;

Hey lovelies, I've decided i wanted to write a new book this one being about the beautiful one and only Luke Hemmings. I hope you enjoy reading this, and I will try to update as much as possible!
Enjoy! Xx
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They knew something was wrong, and so did I. Things hadn't been the same for awhile, and I was scared of what they were gonna tell me.
But this isn't how I thought I would be spending my last years of being a teenager, I thought I'd be out getting drunk, coming home early hours in the morning and just doing other stupid shit teenagers do. Not sitting in a hospital waiting room waiting for the results that could change my whole life.

I look over at my mother, who was sitting there running her hands through her short blonde hair a habit she does when she stressed out or worried. I have to be strong for us no matter what happens. I put my hand on my mums knee and she looks up at me " it's going to be okay mum, I'm going to be fine no matter what happens. You'll be okay too, I need you to be strong for me can you do that for me?" I ask her, she just simply nods.

I then change my attention to my grandma who has also come with us, she was just staring into space probably worrying she's going to lose another loved one to this horrible disease. My grandpa had past away when I was only 11 to bowel cancer, he was more like a dad to me really because my dad had left my mum and I when I was only 2 going on 3. "Tahlia" my grandma says knocking me out of my depressing thoughts. " You're a strong girl, you always have been. You've been though so much in your life and I.. I ..." She started to studder with tears forming in her eyes but she continued anyway pushing the tears away. " I believe you are more then strong enough to get through whatever those results are, your mother and I will be there through everything. We love you so much okay?" I smiled, my grandma always makes me feel better.

I get up and hug them both "I love you both so much" I whisper. Our moment was ruined but the moment I've been dreading for the last week. "Tahlia Foster?" the doctor announces.

I get up and follow the doctor into his office with my mum and my grandma following closely behind me. The room seems more depressing then the waiting room which made me feel even more nervous then I already was. I sit down in between my mother and grandma in front of the doctors desk.

The doctor speaks up "Okay Tahlia I have your test results here..." The worried look on his face tells me something's not right.
My mother grabs my hand squeezing it tightly. " I'm sorry to say this but the test results show that you've been diagnosed with acute myeloid leukaemia" as the words flew out of his mouth I just stared into space, I couldn't speak or hear anything. I refused to believe that this is how my life has turned out. It's now going to be full of test, doctors appointments and in and out of hospital constantly. My teenage years had now been ripped away from me in seconds, I'm never going to be a 17 year old again.

As the harsh reality was sinking in, I look over at my mother who's now crying her eyes out because she had just been basically told her daughters dying. That's when I also realised I'm dying, this doesn't feel real these things only happen in movies not real life. Not to real people like me.

The rest of the appointment was full of my mum crying, my grandma trying to calm her down and the doctor explaining what's now going to happen to me. I just sat there not saying one word barley even listening, just staring into space. I didn't want to know what was now going to happen to me, I just wanted to go home, hop in bed, listen to my music and sleep. Especially pretending today never happen like it was a dream or even some kind of fucked up nightmare.

"Tahlia" someone says beside me, I just still sit there staring into space just wanting the person to go away. "Tahlia" they say again louder I finally look beside me and it's my grandma, I just look at her with no emotion. "The doctor said we can go now honey" I just nod and stand up walking out not saying anything to the doctor, I know it's not his fault I just wanted to get away from there.

The drive home was silent, no one said anything everyone was to busy in there own deep thoughts to speak. I just looked out the window watching cars and houses go by, we finally dropped my grandma home first saying our goodbyes.

As soon as we got home I went up stairs to my room, got changed into leggings and a jumper and just laid there staring at the roof. I must have fallen asleep because I woke up to my mum knocking on my door at 7:30 pm asking if I wanted anything to eat. I wasn't hungry so I said no.
"Honey you need to eat, it's important" she informs me.
"I know mum, but I'm not hungry. I just want to go to sleep okay?" I tell her. She just nods saying goodnight and walking out.

After hours of just laying there my own thoughts eating me alive. Am I going to get through this? Am I going to die, I don't want to die. I'm never gonna grow up and meet the love of my life, get married and have kids or grandchildren. This isn't fair, why do the worst things always happen to me? I still hadn't cried about this surprisingly, even when my mum was crying I felt no emotion what's so ever. It's still doesn't feel real I guess. I still had to go to school tomorrow break the news to my own best friend that I was dying how is she gonna take this? I'm gonna be the talk of the school. People are gonna whisper to each other and point saying "That's the girl that's dying of cancer" "I feel sorry for her" Man this is to much for me to handle I thought to myself.
After another hour of tossing and turning I finally feel into a deep sleep dreading tomorrow.

a/n;