The Birthday Boy 😍

Celeebration too swiftly?🤨

It was a cold December morning, most people were still asleep around this time, given that it had just turned 12:00 AM. But not for our protagonist Corey Taylor. As soon as he noticed the clock shift from PM to AM, Corey sprang up from his bed and shoved a birthday hat on his head. Without warning, he let out a loud ear piercing scream, sending a visible wave of sound across his entire neighborhood. Cars began beeping, dogs and bears were howling, neighbors were running around their house getting ready to flee the planet, Corey had caused chaos and he didn't even know it. All he cared about was his birthday, the 8th of December. In the midst of Corey's short celebration of himself, his telephone jumped off of the desk and landed in front of his feet. He bent over and put it to his ear, "You're wishing me a happy birthday, right?!" Corey immediately questioned the unknown caller with excitement. The caller sighed, "This is the landlord, we're asking if you could keep it down?" Corey made a blank face and slammed the phone back on its cradle. He hopped into his walk-in closet and picked out his best suit. He stared into the mirror as he struggled to tie his tie. There is nothing but the sound of fabric being adjusted in the silence. Corey's eyes shifted to the clock, it's been 30 minutes since his birthday started, and 2/3rds of that time have just been him struggling to tie his tie. Corey walked over to his computer and smacked it on the side, booting it up. He arched his back and squinted his eyes as he typed one key at a time. "How to tie a tie?". Corey walked back to his mirror and did as the internet stranger said, until finally he gave up and tied a slip knot instead. To add to his final touch, he vomited up a piece of plastic and rubbed it in his hair, making his hair glisten in the moonlight. Corey bolted outside and slammed the door off of its hinges, he calmly grabbed his wireless phone and called his best friend, Paul. "Hey-a Paulie!" Corey greets him with a mischievous tone of voice, "Oh! Uh, happy birthday?" Paul answers with a hint of fear. Corey's eyebrow raises into the sky, "Okay?" He waits a few seconds, "Are you going to invite me to a five star restaurant? Buy me a new car? Feed me grapes?" Then silence was heard for about a minute. Paul interrupts, "Yeah, I definitely will! It's just that it's 12 in the morning and nothing fancy is open." Paul waits for Corey's response only to be met with a sarcastic, "And?" Paul repeats himself, "And yea, y'know?" Corey's eyes turn red, "OH COME ON! I'M A BIRTHDAY-BOY FOR CRYING OUT LOUD!" Corey's outburst causes Paul's poorly made Iphone to malfunction and it explodes in his face, hanging up the call. Corey makes a loud rumbling sound as he slams his phone to the ground and he talks to himself. "Whatever! Paul's always slow for EVERYTHING!" He then stops himself, "Except cars. Paul drives fast in cars." Corey puts a hand to his chin, taking a moment to view the large moon. "Y'know what, maybe it is too early," He sighs in a somber tone, "I guess...my birthday can wait." He throws his party hat on the ground, stomping back inside. "Oh my gosh! It's Corey Taylor!" Corey whips his head around to see a stampede of paparazzi holding up a 'Happy Birthday' sign. Corey rolls his eyes as the people drop to their knees, "I'll buy you a new Mercedes!" "I'll buy you a golden toilet paper dispenser!" "I'll take you to a fancy restaurant!" Corey walks into his house and puts the door back on its hinges and he throws himself on the couch. "It's like no one even cares about me!" He rambles on and on until he falls off the couch. "OUCH!"