My eyes widened hands shaking, my hand desperately gripped my shirt near my pounding heart. My vision blurs as tears pickle my eyes.
Scared...
No...
Terrified...
It's pinch black outside only the moonlight provided some light through my window.
Breath...
Fuck...
Sweat cold on my face as I turn my head to the side.
4 am
Same time as yesterday. I shut my eyes tight, don't want to feel the fear in my heart, the sobs that leave my parted lips.
Me on the edge of death.
Chills through my sweaty body causing my nails to dig holes into my shirt.
This shirt was new.
Despite the aching pain in my heart I practically collapse on the floor. I'm trying to support myself onto my arm to pull myself into a sitting position.
Breathing heavily I force myself up onto weak legs.
Taking a pathetic excuse for a breath I practically limp throughwarts the window, I pull it open and allow myself to inhale the night air.
Normally I would admire the city at night but now I can't see clearly as tears began to fall.
Biting my hand desperately to not wake my parents soft whines slip through my mouth mixed with hefty breathing.
Stupidity made me store my medicine in my bathroom. I wish I wouldn't be that organized sometimes.
My body feels limp as I let all my body weight drop against the small sort of sitting area where my window is. The cold night breeze feels like ice on my sweaty skin, but I feel.
I'm not dead... yet
Yet...
Sometimes I think is it worth it, going through all that agony?
Looking down has me thinking. I could just end this misery, I could end it now.
No more pain...
No more pain...
Flinching as something soft yet cold hits my thigh I notice I'm crying.
I'm not dying yet
I don't wanna die...
