Have you ever loved someone so bad? That you'll be obsessed with them, until you become someone whom you never expected to be? You'll try so damn hard to be the person who they like, or rather their typical person.
Na kahit hindi mo na makilala ang sarili mo, basta gustuhin ka lang ng taong gusto mo... Ironically speaking, trying hard to be liked- or far worse to be loved by that person.
I stare blankly at my room's window, reminiscing about the scenes of our first meeting. The way my hair swayed alongside the wind's rhythm and the way our eyes collided with each other. Feeling a weird tingling sensation, weird yet exciting.
This is about a guy well, cliche, yes. Palagi naman 'di ba? Palaging tungkol sa isang lalaking never kang gugustuhin. Or worse, may ibang gusto. Ang sakit 'no? E di ouch.
" Hays! Tulala na naman siya. " basag trip na bungad ni Ciella, kapapasok niya pa lang sa kuwarto ko. Na sa iisang dorm lang kami, pero different rooms. May sarili kaming mga kuwarto, medyo mahal ang bayarin dito kasi nga high class. Walang problema sa kaniya kasi laking yaman namin siya. Ako naman, hindi kami mayaman pero kaya naman.
I applied for a scholarship so hindi iyun issue sa akin, may allowance naman ang scholarship na in-applyan ko so 'yun ang ibinabayad ko.
" Tara Robinsons tayo! " maligalig na pag-aaya nito sa akin. Nakasimangot naman ako, naknam.
" Huy yang pagka-gastador mo, huwag mo akong idamay! " pangkukuntra ko sa kaniya.
" Libre ko. "
" Tara, I'm ready. Lemme just brush my hair. " kaagad akong sumagot at pinagpagan ang suot na cargo pants.
" Wow ha. " taray nito.
" Let's go, my sugar mommy " ngiti ko at hinawakan ang braso niya.
Syempre, masaya dapat tayo ngayon kasi libre ng sugar mommy ko. Para akong tarsier sa kaniya ngayon. Kapag kasi libre, sino ba naman ako para tumanggi 'di ba?
" Rai? " parang dudugo na ang tenga ko. I stormed out of my room to open the door, leaving Ciella.
" Hays ano na naman yan Thianna- ay pucha! " My jaw dropped as I opened the door. Imbes na si Thianna ang bumungad, isang lalaki ang na sa harapan ko. The carbon copy of my bestfriends face. Oh fuck. Fuck!
" Quite feisty, same as ever. " he smiled at me as he slowly looked at my form from head to toe. Shit, I forgot to breathe! Huminga ako nang malalim bago ko siya sagutin, sa totoo lang walang lumalabas sa bibig ko. I can't stop admiring this man's beauty, it's in front of me.
Theo Krenz Au, the name sounds expensive doesn't it? The man that I love. A architect, gwapong nilalang, my total ideal type.
While admiring his features, I forgot to let him in , good thing that his sister arrived that snapped me out of my daydream.
" Huy! Laway mo yucks! " pamimikon ni Thianna, well napikon lang ako ba't ba eh may anger issues ako. Sinipatan ko ito ng masama.
" So, kailan niyo ako papapasukin? " he smiled, obviously having his patience getting thinner and thinner.
" U-uh c-come in. " utal ko sabay pahid sa laway. Tapos pagkakita ko sa binti ko, shit. Ang dumi! May ink pa yung binti ko, kumaripas ako ng takbo papasok sa kwarto ko.
It's already been 3 years since then. Ever since I gave him that sketchbook journal of mine... It has been 3 years since he also threw it away, and it hurts me more knowing that I saw it with my own two eyes. The way he looked unbothered by his actions. The way he immediately walked away from that trashcan... It broke me.
