dangerous love

chapter 1

The fear I feel everywhere I go.

The eyes are always on. 

Constantly looking.

I gulp as I walk around the supermarket, my heart beating faster.

Babump

Babump

Babump

Babump! 

Faster and faster, I jump when I feel a hand on my shoulder, I look over quickly to see a friend of mine Martin, he's around 22 and currently at uni studying psychology, I sigh in relief but my heart be continues to pound in my ears "[name] what's wrong? You're shaking like a leaf?" He asks. 

I shake my head "it's fine, I was just watching a horror film before coming so I'm on edge" I tell him, absolutely lying through my teeth, he glances at me like he knows. 

Oh god, he knows!

He knows.

He knows.

He knows!

I gulp as I feel the sweat drips down my neck "Ah I see, [name] just be careful ok, don't give yourself nightmares" he smiles gently but his eyes say different, I gulp as I nod.

I make my way through the supermarket, grabbing whatever I need, but I can still feel eyes staring at me, inweilding, yet no one makes a move, I don't understand.

Why is it always me, why did I have to be different, why did I have to come out with a mask, please stop staring. I gulp as I buy my things, bag them up, and I go before running home, my tears running down face, the fear and stress pounding at my heart and brain.

I scream waking up from a nightmare, I go to the bathroom to look at myself in the mirror, my co.plexion pale and unyeilding, exhaustion resting on my face like a girls foundation, I sigh as I wash my face before brushing my teeth at the sink. Again, I was being watched in my sleep, another person, climbing through my window, delusional, psychotic. I sigh as I go back to my room. The window is still open, so the person must not have left yet, maybe under my bed, in my wardrobe.

You know what [name] just go back to bed and pretend to sleep, they won't realise I'm wide awake, I get under my quilt and pretend to sleep, the ruffling in my room becomes louder and I feel the hot breath against my face.

Babump

Babump

Babump

Babump

Babump babump babump.

I don't move as I hear a dark, deep chuckle. "Oh baby boy, I will have you soon, so perfect like a deers no ... a lamb" I wait until I hear nothing and my window closes to get back up, I don't turn on my lamp julamin case he's still here so I get up and get ready for work.

By 7:30 I walk to work at the blossom travel school, I'm a teaching assistant at the school, I make my way inside as I wear my lanyard that holds my ID, I go in and make my way to the year 6 class who will be sitting their sats soon ready for high-school, I sigh as I put my things away. The teacher miss Angelina grooney. The teacher for this class gets ready even though the children don't come till 9 sets the pencil pots out. "[Name] you aren't looking to good now a days, is everything OK?" I just look down at the smaller lady her facial expressions show a soft and gentle kind expression but her eyes are I tense, I gulp as I nod "yea just nightmares" she nods "I heard chamomile tea helps you sleep better" she smiles as she gets out a box of the stuff. I look at her, her bright green eyes standing out, I take the box, not wanting to upset her, and I put it in my bag. "Thank you," she chuckles. "No problem." 

Babump, babump

Babump

Babump

Babump

During morning, lessons seem fine, just the usual mental maths and preparing for SATS even the children's gazes are intense, wild.

During break time, they're fighting, playing, or hiding may children, causing more chaos by planting traps everywhere, I sigh. I have talked to the headmaster, but he says let kids be kids. But... these kids are violent, wild like animals looking for their next victim.

I gulp as I furrow my brows as I take pain medication for my headache as I rub my temple.