You, Me, and My Beloved.

The Church of Oldroot.

I woke up.
my alarm was rather loud, it would be hard to sleep through it.
I lazily slap my hand onto the top of the alarm clock, making it shut up for the time being.
it was Sunday, meaning I had church for a few hours.

it was upsetting to say, but I didn't think I could take another day.

I sat up, rubbing my eyes and looking around my bland room.
my room had gray carpet, white walls and a window on the right wall.
the door was to my left if I was looking straight ahead.
my bed was against the wall, and my dresser was against the back wall.
I stood up, stretching my arms the best I could without them hurting.
I walked over to my dresser, grabbing the uniform I never wash and slipping off my PJ's.
I put on some tighter jeans underneath, along with a t-shirt. I hated wearing nothing but underwear under my habit.
I tied up my hair and popped on my wimple, then my habit.
my reflection stared back at me.

I looked horrible.

my eyes were baggy and dry, I was pale and rather small.
it wasn't my fault I was born short.
but that isn't what I'm talking about.
I adjusted my glasses and clipped on my veil.
I didn't want to do anything today, I was tired.
I walk downstairs, opening my fridge and looking inside.
everything felt tampered with.
everything felt poisoned.
I closed my fridge, reaching up and opening the cabinet.
The same goes for the cabinet, everything felt tampered with.
so I didn't touch it.
I closed my cabinet and walked over to the hallway near my door and slipped my shoes on.
I looked out the window, it was fairly nice outside.
so I opened my door and walked outside, only to be hit with a gust of wind.
God damnit.
I sigh, closing my door and locking it.
I hated windy weather.
I attempted to ignore this and started walking down the sidewalk.
the church was not very far from my house, and I didn't have to wait for Clarith this morning.
She told me she'd be at church before me, I don't remember anything else besides that.
the church of Oldroot was old and made of brick.
it was always really cold inside, no matter how many layers I wore, I still shivered.
the doors were large and creaked really loud.
the stained glass was cool, I guess.
I entered the church and closed the doors behind me.
I could tell the members of the church were already a bit panicked, normally this happens when nobody gets ready for mass and ends up doing everything five minutes before.
approaching me was a priest with black hair and incredibly blue eyes.
I hated his eyes.
anyways, he was short for a man. but I can't say much, now can I?
he wore a normal cassock, and looked just as tired as everyone else looked.
"Good morning, Sister Eleanor!"
I forgot to mention.
he's very British.
I nod at him.
"hello, Father Myles."
despite the panicked, tired look in the priest's eyes, he still attempted to smile at me.
his smile didn't make me happy.
he just looked like he was forcing it, which he was.
I spotted Clarith, now ignoring Father Myles and trotting up to Clarith.
Im sure Myles would make a remark about this when I see him next.

Clarith was a bit taller than me, her eyes were brown and her skin was a bit pale. not sickly, like me.
Clarith always had a warm, comforting aura to her, she was a lovely woman.
I wish she knew that.
I shake my head and stand in front of her, trying to give her a smile that didn't make me look horrible.
she smiled back at me.
"Good morning, Elle!"
She was always happy, sometimes I wish I was like her.
"hi.."
I hated how I acted around her.
it was as if I was being interviewed for the first time.
my hands shook all the time, they'd normally sweat as well.
I hid my hands in my sleeves.
"how are you?"
Clarith's smile faded a little, this didn't mean she was upset at me.
"I'm alright, how about you?"
I attempted to make small talk with her, I hated small talk.
I've known Clarith since I was a child.
I remember her coming up to me when I was little, playing on the sidewalk with chalk.
she asked if she could play with me, and we became friends ever since.
I snapped back into reality when she spoke up.
"I'm doing okay. I just wish we got ready before mass, and not five minutes before. you know what I mean?"
I nod.
"of course. these people are just... strange."
I respond, looking around the church of panicking people.
amongst the group of mass hysteria stood the superior.
she was a bit taller than me and Clarith, i'm not sure how tall.
she had tan skin and brown eyes.
if I remember correctly, she was somewhere in her 40s to 50s.
you know, I thought she looked good for her 40s-50s.
she didn't look her age, and I wish that when I got older, I'd age like her.
It's strange, I sound like a child looking up to the nice kindergarten teacher.
she was nice, sometimes.
she was strict, of course. I mean, it would be strange if she wasn't. 
I looked back at Clarith, she was also looking around.
"how long do we have till mass?"
I asked her, causing her to look over at me.
"two minutes."
She said, continuing to look around the church.

two minutes passed.
the bells rang, and people started filing in.
I stood against the wall, next to Clarith.
mass started, the organ kicked on and people started singing.
I hated singing. 
but it was important that I did this.
I look over at Clarith.
I hated my mind around her.
I wanted to be near her all the time.
I wanted to hold hands with her. like we did when we were kids.
I wanted Clarith to know i'd really do anything for her.
I hated yearning.
but it was worth knowing Clarith wouldn't be freaked out by how I felt about her.
I caught myself staring at her again, so I turned back to the person playing the organ.
the person playing the organ was a young priest with brown hair.
I didn't know his name, because he didn't like me.
he was the type of person to judge someone based on a scar they had.
so I didn't like him either.
sometimes, we'd glare at each other when we walked past one another in the hallways.
if he didn't like me, then I didn't like him. and I believe that is fair enough.

I felt a hand on my shoulder.
I thought it was Clarith so I ignored it.
"Sister Eleanor."
I looked up, noticing it was the superior that was talking to me.
"follow me, please."
She started walking down the hallway.
I felt like I did something wrong, but I couldn't recall if I did.
I followed her, not speaking to her at all.
She led me upstairs and into her small, overly decorated office.
her office looked more like an elementary classroom, with all the random stuff thrown about.
not how I'd decorate my office if I ever had one, but I'm not here to judge.
she sat down and motioned for me to sit as well.
"Sorry, Sister. but I couldn't help but notice you looked a bit exhausted today."
I stared at her, she did all of this just to tell me she felt concerned for me?
weird.
"I'm fine, Mother."
I reassured her the best I could.
Mother Margaret was always concerned for everyone's health ever since dearest Anna went missing.
she didn't look like she believed me.
"are you sure? you can sit out for five minutes if not."
she leaned on her desk, frowning a bit.
I shake my head and wave my hand a little as if I was swatting a fly.
"I'm fine! I swear!"
I sounded angry at her, but I wanted to sound like I was all fine and dandy.
"whatever you say."
she leaned back in her chair.
"you may leave then."
she motioned to the door, causing me to stand up and leave. closing the door behind me.