broken but not lost Book 2 (boatboys fanfic)

chapter 1

Warning ⚠️ suicidal thoughts but maybe actions idk if it counts as an action tho ⚠️

Joel's pov:

Today is me and Lizzie's wedding and I'm excited but It also feels kinda... not right? Does that make sense? Don't get me wrong I love Lizzie and I wanna get married.

To be honest sometimes I still think about Etho. I think about his eyes, and his hair, and how beautiful he looks under his stupid mask! I don't get to see him without his mask off very often anymore...

WAIT- NO No no no... I am getting married today to Lizzie and we can't be having thoughts like that about someone else.

I snap back to reality and look and my groomsman 'Grian and Jimmy' they where talking to me about something but I have no clue what, they where making no sense.

All of a sudden I got a call from an unknown number. the sound of my phone ringing caught their attention and I showed them the screen.

"Answer it." Jimmy said and I did as he said.

"Hello? Who is this?" I said. Hello, are you Joel Smallishbeans? The person from the other line said. "Ummm, yeah?" I said confused. "There is no easy way to tell you this but... Your fiance has been in a car accident and she is in a coma"

I felt my heart sink at the words. I know I was having second thoughts not very long ago at all but I mean, this is not what I wanted. I still wanted to marry Lizzie... unless it's a sign? NO NO NO if it where I sign then I would be the one that got hurt. Right?

"Hello? Are you there?" I heard the man on the other side say. "I- uh y-yeah I a-am..." I said my voice trembling. I didn't realize I was crying until now.

The man told me which hospital she was at and that once I got to the hospital I could get more information about what happened exactly. Then he hung up the phone and I put it down shaking.

"Joel?, Joel what's going on?" Jimmy asked sounding worried. "Sh-she's in a c-coma..." Jimmy looked confused by the answer and so did Grian but he still didn't say anything. "Who's in a coma?" Jimmy asked."l-lizzie she got in a car accident" I said as I started to slide down the wall I was leaning on and curl into a ball.

Grian just looked like he was in shock and didn't move, and Jimmy looked like he was trying not to cry.

"N-NO! No! Sh-she can't be!" He said as he started to cry too.

It was silent for a few seconds but then there was a knock on the door which made Grian jolt a little.

"Petal? Is everything okay? I heard yelling." It was Scott. Jimmy opened the door, hugging his husband immediately. Scott looked confused and looked at Grian who now also looked like he might cry.

All of a sudden Jimmy pulled away and handed him the car keys that where in his pocket.

"Go start the car. We'll be out there in a minute." Jimmy said sniffling and whipping his tears.

Scott looked at Jimmy then at Grian then Joel. He was obviously very confused but just went outside and got the car ready anyways.

Jimmy walked over to Joel and sat next to him. "I-its gonna be ok... She's not dead right. I-i mean it could be worse." He said full knowing that if he where in Joel's position this would just make him angrier.

Joel didn't say anything but just left the room and went outside to get in the car.

Grian and Jimmy looked at each other then followed him outside.

When they got in the car Grian told Scott where to go.

"Grian, Please inform the guest what happened and that the wedding will be postponed." Jimmy said turning around to look at Grian who was sitting next to Joel in the backseat. Grian nodded and pulled out his phone and a phew minutes later out it back down.

-

We had stopped at a gas station because stupid Grian needed to pee soOoo badly.

Everyone has gotten out to use the bathroom but me. It's only a 45 minute drive I don't know what's wrong with them.

All of a sudden my phone buzzed and I opened the message to see who it was from.

To my surprise it was non other than Etho. Which was strange, I mean we're still 'friends' I guess but it's weird because we never hang out. I invited him to the wedding but I didn't think he would come.

Ethoslab: hey Joel I heard the news about Lizzie and I just wanted to make sure you don't do anything stupid

Me: stupid like what exactly?

Ethoslab: you know what I mean Joel.

I didn't reply to the message, because as much as hate to admit it. Etho knew me better than myself. He could read me like a book without us even being in the same city.

And as always, he was right I did think about doing something stupid. There was a cliff about 30 yards behind the gas station.

(There I Like the middle of nowhere on top of a mountain or something cuz they wanted the wedding with no buildings or people around.)

He knew that I was thinking it before I was thinking it.

But some stupid little text messages isn't going to stop me.

Lizzie would probably be better without me. And when she did wake up she probably wanted to see her brother. Or her parents. Not my ugly ass face.

I looked around and made sure no one was watching me before walking over to the edge.

I looked down and began to cry. I just wanted all the pain to stop. All the sadness, and anger, and I am a horrible person for thinking of stupid my stupid ex on my wedding day.

(OoooOooOoooooooOo cliff hangerrrrr also that was a LOT for the first chapter I know I'm mentally ill you don't need to tell me 😁)