The Hospital Boy

Chapter 6

Things are getting really hard.
My earbuds dissapeared (I think one of my brothers stole them) and my mom isn't willing to buy me new ones and yells at me if I play my music out loud so I can't listen to music :'( which is my only escape.
Everyday I'm forced to wake up at 4:40am and drag myself to the bus stop so I can listen to a bunch of people talk shit about me and put me down, just to arrive at a place filled with more people that talk shit and pick on me.
Im getting really sick of it.
My " mental illness " hasn't given me one break and now I'm not getting enough sleep, some nights none at all. If I do happen to get sleep I always wake up from the night terrors and end up not sleeping for the rest of the night/early morning/day.
My sleeping pattern is taking a toll on me and my grades are falling apart, along with my participation and 'good and hard working student' record.

Everything in my life is a never ending black hole of garbage. The light at the end if the tunnel is... Something... And I always end up running to it. I haven't talked to any of my friends lately, mostly because I'm too depressed and I'll just drag them down with me.

So yeah, there's my life, sorry it's so long.

~Ashley's pov~

I woke up hearing birds chirping, stupid fucking birds, fuck them. I groaned and sat up, rubbing my eyes.

I remember Andy holding me in his lap, oh shit!

What have I done!?!? I must have been so heavy! How could he pick me up so easily!?

I began to breathe heavily, I gripped the pillow and cried into it, sitting in the corner of my bed as I always did.
I was having a panic attack.

Amy came rushing in,
"ASHLEY I'M SO SORRY I WASNT HERE YESTERDAY, I WANTED TO GO BUT I JUST COULDNT MOVE! IM SO SORRY, I HEARD WHAT HAPPENED, ASH YOU OKAY???"

I flinched and she engulfed me in a hug, this really made me want Andy's hugs, or... No! Stop it! I can't even trust her, she left me! Although, it wasn't her fault....

"STUPID, STUPID, STUPID, STUPID, NO WONDER NO ONE LOVES YOU, YOU IDIOT" I pushed her away screaming at myself, sobbing and shaking.

"Ash, calm down, you aren't stupid."

"YOU CAN'T FUCKING TRUST HIM, HE'LL JUST HURT YOU!!"

"Ash..." My eyes widened at the deep voice that came from the room. Everything froze but my tears streaming down my face,

"GODDAMMIT!" I threw myself against the wall and slid down, crying and shaking, telling myself words of hate.

After a few minutes I calmed down, Andy was outside the door and Amy awaited patiently for me to say something.

"Ash, were you screaming about not trusting Andy?"

I couldn't speak, a lump on my throat forbid me, I nodded not trusting my voice at all.

"Honey, you can trust him just as you trust me, trust him more than me actually. Please."

I slowly nodded, half doubting. That wonderful and joy filled smile crept upon Amy's face, tears of joy sprung from her eyes.

Maybe she really did care,

"Oh Ash..." She pulled me into a hug,
"This will only help you, I promise"

I nodded and looked at the doorway to see Andy smiling at me.

~Andys pov~

I saw Ashley nod his head, I have won his trust. And I'm going to cherish that for as long as I live.

My mom came up to me minutes later, "you, me, talk, outside, now." Her words seemed so harsh.

Ash looked at me confused and I gave him a reassuring smile.

We walked outside his room and into the wall,
"Alright, what happened after you found him in the corner crying?"

"What?"

"AFTER HANNAH TRIED TO ATTACK ASH FOR NOT TAKING HIS PILLS, WHAT DID YOU DO?" She had anger and happiness in her voice, and it terrified me.

"I-i picked him up and took him to his room."

"And..?"

"And after a while I held him in my lap until he fell asleep."

She sighed and smiled at me happily.
"I'm so proud of you. "

"I didn't expect that you would earn his trust that way, but... It's great."

I smiled at her and she left to check on how her other patients were doing.

I walked into Ashley's, to see him siting, not in the corner, but in the middle of his bed.
I smiled at him, as did he to me.

It was a small one, yes, but genuine.