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Ch. 66: Tourment (noun) torment; anguish

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Tourment (noun) torment; anguish

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Tourment (noun) torment; anguish

We had fought for this peace.

Bled for this peace.

And now, it was all slipping away again.

The children. They were the weight I couldn't bear to leave behind. Yet I knew I had no choice. Not if I was to keep Claire safe. Not if we were to make it out of here alive.

I glanced at her, standing so close by my side, holding that child's hand like she could never let go. I could feel the tension in her every breath—her anger, her worry. She didn't want me to make this decision. I knew that. But she was strong enough to know I had to.

I swallowed hard, trying to push down the lump in my throat. "Claire," I said softly, almost apologetic. "We can't take them with us. Not now. It's too dangerous. And besides, I've fought so hard to negotiate peace, and now everything's in jeopardy again. I can't leave without finding out what Shayla is up to."

I saw the way her jaw clenched, the way her hand tightened around the little girl's small, trembling fingers.

"I get it. But they're just children, Bastien," she finally whispered, her voice shaking. "We can't leave them. Not like this. We can't—"

"I know," I cut in gently. "I know, Claire." But my hands were shaking, betraying me, betraying the certainty I wished I could feel. "I want to take them with us. I swear, I do. But this threat doesn't go away if we turn back now." My eyes flicked to the soldiers, the grim faces of those who understood what was at stake. "I can't afford to be weak."

If I had any other choice than following Chastity, I would take it. But right now, this was our choice. I couldn't let my chance to bring peace to the Lawless Lands slip away because I was too afraid to try.

I could see the hurt in her eyes, but she didn't look away. She understood that I had to make the hard choices. That didn't make it easier, though.

"We're not weak," she said quietly. "Choosing to protect the innocent is not weakness. It's who you are. At your core."

The words sank into me like a stone, but she was right. Diana, I knew she was. I wanted to be that man. The one who would never leave behind those who needed us. But...

"The longer we stay, the more vulnerable we are. We're already stretched thin. I need you focused, Claire. I need you by my side. We can't do this if we're distracted."

She held my gaze for a long moment. I saw the flicker of understanding in her eyes, but there was something else there, too—a sadness that tightened her features.

She swallowed hard and nodded. "Fine. But they have to be safe. And they can't stay here."

"I promise," I whispered, my voice thick with something more than just regret.

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