The shell of what I was

Chapter one: Note to self

Note to self; don't fall for someone you can't have, I learnt the hard way. I lay on my bed, wrapping my fingers around the soft fabric. I bite my lip as I try my hardest not to cry, it's been exactly three day's since Robert abounded me, literally, I still find myself crying over it I was with him for two years, he was a part of me. You know when you finish a puzzle, but there's that one piece that's missing but then suddenly you find it and you feel happy and relieved like a piece of you has been found. Well that's how I felt when I first met Robert, but things took a turn for the worst when he decided he didn't want me anymore, I shouldn't be surprised it happened before.

My thoughts got distracted when I heard a faint knock on my door, "come in" I called, it was my younger sister "Nina, mum wants you to come and eat dinner" her squeaky voice rings in my ear. I slowly nodded my head; I didn't feel like eating, I noticed my sister walking towards me. I felt bad for not being there for her even though she's only seven and doesn't have many problems. I haven't been the best sister for her only ever thinking about Robert and my friends completely forgetting the fact that I have a younger sister to care for. She sat on my bed and wiggled around to get more comfortable, she looked at me as if she had something to say.

"Are you okay?" she whispers, I felt a little surprised no one has asked me that in months, I didn't know how to respond, instead I just nodded my head "just a little tired, nothing to worry about" she stares at me not saying anything. There was something in her eyes almost like sadness, but why? Was she really worried about me? Without a word she walked out of my room and shut the door behind her. These past days have been a roller coaster of emotions; my mind was all over the place I just can't wait till this is all over.

This morning was a blur; I stood next to my locker staring at the timetable stuck on my locker door. Methods was my first class, how exciting. I closed my locker and saw my friend Nicki running towards me, she threw her arms around me and pulling me in for a tight hug, I responded to the hug and pulled her close to me. She let out a sigh and pulled out her timetable "history first, what about you?"

"Methods"

"Dang, another year without us two in the same class" she said in a sad tone, "at least we'll see each other at lunch" I said trying to cheer up Nicki. Nicki and I have been friends since we were six; we basically grew up together, we did everything together and we never left each other's side. I would say I'm extremely lucky to have a best friend like Nicki.

"Well, I have something exciting to tell you" Nicki jumped up, "what is it?"

"We're going camping together!" she squealed, "w-what" I hate camping, or anything that has to door with outdoor activates. "You know I hate camping" I whined "please, for me!" she said putting her arms on each of my shoulders; I guess it won't be that bad maybe I can escape for a little bit. "Fine", "YES, THANK YOU" she hugged me again, "I can finally get closer to Adam" Nicki murmured "Adam?" I asked.

"He's my neighbour and he's coming with us"

"Oh really and how come I don't know about Adam?"

"Sorry, it's just I forgot to tell you"

I crossed my arms and raised my eyebrow "is he cute?"

"Oh my god Nina, focus! Anyways, his sister is coming too; she's our age and her names Cara"

Cara, that's a nice name I wonder if anyone else is coming that Nicki hasn't informed me about.

"Anyone else?", "nope just us four, I'm so excited" Nicki clapped her hands in excitement but her little fit ended when the bell for homeroom rang and Nicki bolted off waving as she ran to her class. I had a terrible feeling about this trip, maybe it's because I've never camped before and I'm not fit to hike or do anything normal healthy people do or maybe it's because it will be the first time I go somewhere without Robert, whatever it was it made me feel nausea's.