Don't hate me, Hyung!

Update.

Hey Guys,
I just wanna say a few words.

Iam feeling depressed from a two years now..I try to play the piano, make stories, Write stories, study but nothing is really interesting. I dreamed of becoming an Artist but iam just tired now..

I have fake Friends, They made me depressed even more, A Mother who keeps telling me to die, Kill myself and why she regretted giving birth to me when angry. Siblings of more than 10+ age gap. They are close and Iam left out...My father passed away when I was just 7 and it just hurts seeing others with their dad, siblings..Many of people dream of not having siblings, While iam here dreaming of siblings who are actually close..I feel like dying, I have tried to cut myself but I can't..I just scratch my skin, Trying to make it bleed. I have insecurities. I don't like myself, My siblings are so fair and iam here..Looking like a crow..My face is just my biggest insecurity....I think iam being annoying to everyone..I tried to tell my feelings to my mum, But she didn't care..My sister cared for a bit, But I don't know..I just feel like killing myself would provide happiness for everything..My pet cat got lost 10 months ago..Nobody understands me..They don't see when iam studying, Nobody appreciates me..They just notice my mistakes, how iam feeling inside. my heart is heavy! I just cry out of nowhere..I imagine, jumping from a bridge..I just wanna die..I just wonder if iam even gonna see my 15th birthday..

I am tired of everything. I quit. Iam fcking tired. From everything, These might should small, But for me, It's not. My own uncle, Doesn't like me...Nobody does..Iam just a burden to them..All.