Where The Monster Dwells

Chapter 7

I woke up from my nap, and I looked at my watch. It was barely noon. From how I was laying on my bed I couldn't really look outside the window, but I could see the rays of sun penetrating the normally dark room. The curtains were drawn open, which meant that Carlos had already gotten up. In order to confirm my thoughts, I looked over to the other bed on the other side of the room. There laid Carlos fast asleep. He looked peaceful. It was at that point that I wished that one day I'd be at peace with myself. My body. My inner demons.

I figured Bree had already done her morning rounds; she liked to make sure that there weren't any runaways. Now was my chance. I quietly rose from the bed. I was in my pajamas, which consisted of a simple black t-shirt and navy blue pajama bottoms. I walked over to the dresser knowing that at any moment someone could come in the room or Carlos could wake up. I reached for a random shirt, some blue jeans, and some socks. I quickly made my way to the right side of my bed. The farthest point away from Carlos. I sat on the bed so that I could quickly duck down to the floor if he woke up or if someone walked in. I took off my pajama pants and put on my jeans. I put my socks on. I felt nervous. I always felt nervous when I got to this point. Three months living here and I still wasn't used to this. I quickly took of my shirt. I heard shuffling behind me, and I instantly threw myself into the floor.

"A-are you okay?" Carlos said weakly.

"Mhm. I-I'm changing. Could you look the other way?" I said poking my head up over the bed to make sure Carlos looked the other way.

"Yeah, dude." He got up and turned around. He walked over to the closet. The way we had divided the room was: I got a normal sized dresser and a small dresser while he got the closet and a small dresser. His sleep attire was much more daring than mine. Carlos always slept in his underwear, which always seemed to leave me amazed. Not in the sexual way. I could care less as to what Carlos looked like under their clothes. Although Carlos was admittedly attractive, I couldn't see myself with someone like him. He wasn't perfect, but he was definitely better off than me. He was also better off without me, but that didn't stop him from trying to become friends with me. I was always amazed at the fact that a guy could be so confident and secure. I can't even take off my shoes without the monster stirring in my mind. I decided to remain on the floor as I put my shirt on.

"Carver," He said as I got up off of the floor, "You don't have to keep doing this, you know. I don't care if you have scars of anything like that. 'Sides you're a fit guy. But, regardless of that, you shouldn't be ashamed of your body looks. Love yourself."

I just smiled, but I knew he was right. I went to the hallway bathroom to finish getting ready for the day while Carlos finished changing. When I came back he had already made our beds.

"Thanks, Carlos." I said sitting on my bed to put my shoes on.

"No problem. Listen, dude, come home early from the hospital tonight, and we'll talk. We haven't gotten a chance to talk in a while." He said. Ever since I came home from the hospital three months ago, I opened up to Carlos. He reminded me of a wise, old owl. He had been through hell and back, and he was still going. I definitely admired him.

Anyways, Carlos had a room to himself and offered for me to take the other bed, while Trevor moved into Darcy's room. Carlos had become my personal counselor. He knew everything about me and I knew everything about him. In these three month of living together we had become great friends.

I left the room and walked downstairs to the kitchen. I noticed that Whitfield was standing around talking to Judith. I stopped to say hey to them before I ate my breakfast. Over breakfast the topic of the upcoming Community Day was discussed. Whitfield had come up with the idea to host a neighborhood party. They said that it'd probably ending happening in a few weeks. I wasn't sure how I felt about it. Based on the slight details given, it sounded like family would be permitted to visit during this supposed Community Day affair. The thought of my mom not going made me uneasy, yet I couldn't blame her. If that day ever came it'd probably be me visiting Mom considering the current situation of things. After I finished, I told Judith that I was ready to go to the hospital. On our way I got to thinking about that fateful night three months ago. How I didn't know what to expect.