Connor Franta

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i'm tired. i'm so tired. not from a lack of sleep, but from a sheer amount of disbelief. from seeing this watercolor world we live in slowly turning a light shade of tin. smiles fading to frowns, ups turning to downs. some of us have lost our spark, lost our drive, lost our heart. and frankly, i'm tired of it. i'm exhausted by the sight of lives lacking a certain light, when each and every one of us deserve that right. now do me a favor, and lend me your ears. keep your eyes peeled, place them here. poetry and fancy word play on hold, here's a meaningful story i've never told:
you see, a couple of weeks ago, a day like any other, i was heading to meet up with some friends for lunch. and for some reason i truly couldn't be bothered with tackling the mess that is los angeles parking. so, i called myself a taxi. you see, i'm the type of person who likes to make conversation with pretty much anyone and everyone, whether it's an old lady at a bus stop, or a barista at a coffee shop. people are people, and they all have something to say. after a few introduction sentences, me and this thirty-something year-old gentleman realised we're both creative types, originally from the mid-west, out here in los angeles, pursuing our many artsy endeavours. we continued conversing but quickly things got a little bit deeper. he asked me, "was your family okay with you moving out to a bigger city and chasing such an alternative career type?" "definitely", i said, "they're just happy i'm happy and doing something i love everyday." he continued by saying, "good. that's really good you're doing something you're passionate about. a lot of people nowadays can't seem to say that." he hesitated slightly but then continued, "you know, my dad and brother worked night and day for practically their entire lives receiving little pay for doing something they didn't enjoy at all. they both always talked about how, 'it'll be worth it one day. we can spend our hard-earned money later on. we will live a good life, eventually.' but you know what? neither of them got that. my dad died unexpectedly four years ago, and my brother just last year. they'll never get to live the life they always wanted to, so it's honestly very nice to see people following their heart and living their life now, rather than later." and at that point, he dropped me off. after only a ten minute car ride, i left with a new perspective in my mind. life waits for no one. if yours isn't going the way you want it to; if you aren't pursuing what you want to pursue; if you wake up with immediate dread; constantly saddened by the hours ahead; moving through the days feeling lost, heart in a haze; holding back what you wanna say; waiting to be yourself another day; all your dreams and desires put on hold; to be fulfilled, maybe when you're old; you aren't doing it right; you aren't living your life; eventually is not okay; why tomorrow when there is today? I finally feel like I'm finding my way, and not just living day by day. i'm doing what i love, i'm going where i wanna go, i'm being who i want to be. i'm happy. and you know what? i think everyone deserves to feel the same way.

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