his eyes
those eyes are what captivate me
every time
they are so tired
and done
done with everything
yet so wise and hopeful
he is a player
I know
even he tells me so
he gets high
so he won't have to feel
so the pain won't take him away
I don't mind
I know he won't love me
like I love him
he's in it for the pictures
I know
he is so broken and torn
ripped apart inside
and out
he sees no way out
other than the smoke in his lungs
and the cuts on his arms
he's a liar
I know
he lies all the time
he confuses us all
his friends think
he's gotten three girls pregnant
yet
he is a virgin
his deep brown eyes
look down at me
they try to say things
only I can see
then his friend comes along
and his cute side fades
he puts on his tough guy facade
the man I know
and love
is nowhere to be found
it hurts to know
how fast he can change
the sweetness in his voice
just moments ago
replaced with knives and sharp things
he throws them around
and I duck away to safety
his friend laughs along
and I cry and mend my cuts
I stand back up
and expect the worst
but there he stands
in solitude
with his big brown eyes
boring into mine
"Sorry"
he says
and kisses me gently
I forgive him
not because he apologized
nor because he was so cute
but because I know
that one day
I'll lose him completely
and my forgiveness
won't be needed
I dread that day
but for now
I will stand by him
and take cover when needed
he is not perfect
oh so far from perfect
but that is what makes him
him