him .

one .

If there's one thing I remember vividly, it's that first night we all went out to that lake . the sun was just setting & I couldn't help but take in how beautiful the sight was .. you'd kept telling me 'come here' as if I was going to runaway; as if I wanted to be anywhere but there with you . I didn't, by the way . you were my favorite place & I think you still are . I was so happy . you were there, I was there & everything was just so open yet secluded at the same time . you'd kept telling me I was beautiful . I was gorgeous . you'd throw me soft smiles every now & then & you'd pull me to your side & hug me like you'd never wanted to let go . the mosquitos got bad & you could tell I was getting eaten up, you'd suggested bug spray, I gave you a slight 'mhm', got closer to you & stuck my arms into the back of your shirt, you chuckled & mumbled something along the lines of 'putting your arms in my shirt so they'll stop biting you?' bug spray came shortly after & it was so disgusting, I'd never liked the feel of bug spray . you messed up your fishing line so we stood there for a good ten minutes trying to get it untangled . I held the light for you & we kept making eye contact, you'd smile down at me & then continue cutting the line . we left shortly afterwards .. we had to walk through the 'woods' to get back to the car & I'm not sure if you thought I was struggling or if I was just walking too slow for you, but you'd made me get on your back & you gave me a piggy back ride till we crossed the road & I was placed back down on my feet . at that moment, I was so sure of you . I'd replayed every moment we'd just had & I just . I was happy & I was lucky & for a couple of minutes I thought you could actually be mine .. I realize now, that you were never mine; you were always hers .