Pas De Deux

one.

Love. It's such a simple yet incredibly powerful word to contemplate, don't you think?

So many people spend their whole lives searching for it or what they imagine it to be at least. They have this hungry craving for it, like it's going to complete them as a person or something.

And I thought I knew what love was as well. I had my own little idea of the perfect guy who would buy me flowers and kiss me in the sunshine. But perhaps I had been watching too many soppy rom-coms.

In reality, it wasn't like that at all. I thought I had found love once. Even though I was only sixteen, I was so sure that it was the real deal. I argued with anyone who told me it wasn't. Oh, how stupid and naive I was. I suppose I just wanted it to be the fairytale I had so dearly hoped for.

But it wasn't. I found myself making more and more sacrifices and completely changing who I was and who I wanted to be just to please him.

That isn't what love is.

Love is unconditional. There shouldn't be the need to change anything about yourself, because even the flaws should be seen as beautiful by them. Every aspect about you should be whole heartedly accepted, then perhaps you can get a true idea of what love is. But once again, this is not what happened.

Not to me anyway.

So this is my story. A story of one naive sixteen year old girl who thought she had found her the boy of her dreams, when in fact she couldn't be more wrong.

*****

"We're going to be late..." Annie groaned, tapping her foot impatiently as she stood at the front door.

"Sorry, sorry... I just can't seem to find my bow" I replied, sifting through the pile of junk that had been scattered in the hallway. I knew I should have paid more attention to where I threw that thing.

"Aha! Gotcha!"

I spotted the silky burgundy-coloured material and yanked it quickly from the mess. I had to be more careful next time.

"Finally... can we go now?" Annie huffed, turning to make her way out into the driveway.

I rolled my eyes at me as I hastily pulled the bow onto my head. It bunched up quite a bit and made my hair go all ruffled, but I didn't mind. I quite liked the disheveled look.

"Bye mum!" I yelled, not bothering to wait for her response before I followed Annie out the front door, making sure to shut it behind me. She knew where I was going anyway, I went there practically every day. I then began exaggerating my skipping down the driveway, flailing my arms randomly.

"You're such a weirdo sometimes" Annie laughed, scrunching up her nose at my child-like behaviour.

"I was just warming up" I defended as the pair of us headed down the quiet street, side by side.

"Yeah right... just pratting around is more like it!"

I loved that Annie and I had such a close friendship that we could take the piss out of each other all the time. I guess that's what best friends are for, right?

"How could you think that?" I gasped, placing my hand to my chest in mock-hurt, "Me? Pratting about?"

"Oh ha ha... But seriously we can't afford to be late"

"We're not going to be" I assured her.

"Why do I feel like you don't take dancing as seriously as I do?"

The tone of her voice was sort of off, so I couldn't tell whether she was being serious or not. I hated when she does that. It's like she goes out of her way to confuse me.

"Of course I take it seriously, chill out... we're not even there yet"

"And who's fault was that?" She replied, raising an eyebrow at me knowingly. Sometimes she acted like my mother.

"Hey... you know this bow completes my outfit" I joked, pointing at the burgundy ribbon wrapped tightly around my wavy, blonde hair.

"Hm... well I guess I can't disagree with that..." she giggled, giving into my humour and surveying my clothes.

I was only wearing a pair of black leggings, a crocheted white top and my favourite burgundy dolly shoes. It was simple, yet coordinated. Just the way I liked it.

"Pops..."

"Yeah?"

"Do you think we could actually do this?" Annie asked hesitantly, before she was forced to dart out of the way of a speeding bike that whipped past her when we stepped into a busier part of town.

Our dance studio wasn't far from here but I always hated going through this part of town. It was so crowded and people didn't seem care if they knocked into you.

"What win the dance show, you mean? Err... yeah of course... have you seen me dance?"

She giggled meaningfully, "Wow, you're so cocky."

The two of us laughed at our casual silliness. We both knew that I was only joking really. I was actually quite conscience about my dancing.

"I'm serious though... We've got this" I smiled, genuinely meaning it this time.

Our dance group had been rehearsing for the annual dance show for nearly two months now and we were so ready for it. We knew exactly what steps to do at each precise moment. I mean, we didn't really have room for failure. Stephanie, our teacher, made sure of that.

In spite of her strictness, I loved dancing with a passion. I had been doing it since I was five years old, when my mum needed a way for me to release all my energy. And now, eleven years on, I am still here. Doing what I love, with people like Annie who I can enjoy it with.

I simply couldn't be happier. And even though I was admittedly quite nervous about the show, I also was excited beyond belief.

"I guess..." She sighed unconfidently. Annie was much more nervous than I was, perhaps because she was simply a shyer person than I was.

"So um... When are you seeing Tommy again?" She questioned, changing the subject.

"Oh I don't know... whenever he calls me really"

"Are you two officially like, boyfriend and girlfriend then?" She teased, fluttering her eyelashes in a jokey manner.

"Not yet" I admitted, a small grin tugging on my lips.

The truth was I really, really, really liked Tommy. He was so gorgeous and charming. Literally everything about him was perfect.

His swishy dark hair, his bright blue eyes and his fashionable glasses that made him look smart, but also really sexy at the same time.

"You know what I mean?" Annie said, dragging me from my thoughts. Oops, I hadn't been listening to a word she had been saying. I was too busy drooling over images of Tommy.

"Uh, what?"

"Do you ever listen?" Annie sighed,

"Sorry..." I shrugged, giving her an apologetic smirk.

"I was just saying you only like him so much because he looks exactly like that model from Look magazine"

"That's not true!" I blushed, despite knowing it really was. I hadn't noticed it at first, but the more I saw him, the more I saw striking similarities.

"Oh come off it... You know the one I'm talking about" she laughed, playfully nudging my shoulder as we walked.

"Nope sorry, no idea."

She rolled her eyes at me and was just about to spew another witty response until we finally realised we were here. The familiar rustic building that was our dance studio.

It probably needed a lot of refurbishing because it was basically falling apart, but that didn't matter. To me, it was like heaven. A little place where dreams are created. I know that sounds soppy beyond belief, but it's true.

And as Annie and I stepped inside, the overwhelming feeling that I knew so well rushed over me. I was home.