Part 5

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The end of spring is fading fast and I'm going insane with how much I'm thinking of you. I'm sickly in love with you and I honestly need to purge you from my system.

But instead, I want you to feel the same clawing desperation. I need you to understand the anguish, the complete misery and bliss you give me. More than anything, I want to know your thoughts, the things your never admit to anyone. I want to know the lies and why it's easier to say that than the truth.

But my desires don't coincide with yours. But yours will always come first, I promise.

When you're up there, speaking on stage. I know this is hopeless. It's humiliating and crushing and it's tearing me apart. But somehow I still think: maybe.

My optimism is like a lone flower in a thunderstorm, still hoping to bloom once more.

Even the brightest people have dark edges.

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