Ch. 16

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I pulled my body away from this sleepy frame and wished I could stay there forever.

I lifted his arm off my chest and jumped out of the bed. I slid on his boxers and his t-shirt and walked to the dresser in the far corner.

I found a note pad and pen and wrote a quick note.

'Dear Zayn,

I am sorry for everything. I know that you are repulsed by me and that you only wanted my body. I know that you don't love me.

By the time you get this note, I will be gone. Thank you for everything. Thank you for the perfect night.

Love, Ely'

I placed the note beside the lamp and grabbed my bag and walked out the door.

'I knew it was late, but dad might be drunk again.' I thought to myself. He might not remember me leaving the house with Zayn. I just might not get beat to death.

I know what I was doing was stupid, but I need to leave this life. I NEED to be gone. I need him to see that I am not worth charity.

----------------20 min later---------------

I looked at my front door and heard a large crash. 'Maybe I should go around' I thought. I crept around the house and opened the kitchen door and jumped up the stairs and walked to my messy room. I looked around, mentally saying goodbye to my old room. I walked to my bathroom and turned the lock closed even though I was pretty sure it was broken.

I turned on the shower and pulled out the note pad and pen from Zayn's house.

'To: whom ever this concerns

I know when I am unwanted and I know when I need to leave. This is my final time to leave. I love you Zayn Malik, but I know you don't feel the same.

I will forever love you and miss you.

Goodbye"

I taped the note to the broken mirror and looked in my closet. I know I shouldn't do this but what the hell.

I pulled out the remaining ADHD pills from when my mother lived.

'Warning: do not consume on an empty stomach, with alcohol. Do not consume over 10 at once.'

Well looks like I am gonna take 12.

I pulled out the pills and placed one in my mouth and drank it down with water.

11 to go

Drink

10 to go

Drink

9 to go

Drink

8 to go

Drink

7 to go

Drink

6 to go

Drink

5 to go

Drink

4 to go

Drink

3 to go

Drink

2 to go

Drink

1 to go

Drink

None to go.

With the last of my strength, I pulled out my old razor and slid it across my wrist.

10 times I did this.

Just as i was about to pass out the door swung open and Zayn walked in.

"Ely" he whispered as my eyelids fluttered.

"Zayn..." And then the darkness over took me.

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