dumb feels.

Crash

She remembers everything.

She remembers that she can't control her life.

It's emptying.

Never in her life has she ever had control of what happened.

Control was something she has constantly tried to imagine.

But it always goes away.

The thought of control is an impossibility that wasn't okay.

Not to her, or her family.

She liked to pretend that her life was a fantasy.

That everything that was happening wasn't real.

Her vision of reality would never heal

Unless she could do what she needed.

But her needs always went unheeded.

So she always crashed in on herself.

Losing her own feeling of vanity.

And everyday

Feeling closer to her own insanity.