heal me (in more ways than one)

Chapter Two

Louis wakes up with a boner. His first instinct is to pretend it isn't there and go back to sleep, but then he realizes that people probably wake up their girlfriends and ask them to take care of it instead. So he rolls over and taps Eleanor's shoulder until she mumbles and sits up, rubbing her eyes. He asks her to get him off, and she flashes him a small smile before pulling down his pajama bottoms. Louis closes his eyes while she does the job, pretending it isn't her that's getting him off, but he will never admit that it isn't even a girl that he's imagining.

Louis loves Eleanor, he really does. They wouldn't be in a four-year relationship if he didn't. But lately he's been wondering if it's romantic love, or more of a friendly love. It makes him nauseous to think about, because the whole point of dating Eleanor is to fall in love with her. That's his plan - marry a girl, any girl will work, and make it to the big leagues; no one will have to know about how he feels on the inside. Growing up he saw all kinds of people have their careers ruined because they were gay, but not Louis. If he wants to be straight, then he'll do everything in his power to be straight.

After Louis comes, Eleanor climbs on top of him, straddling him and leaning in for a kiss. "Maybe get me off, yeah?" she mumbles in his mouth as she works her lips against Louis' still, firm ones. He's a bit grossed out to be honest, because how obvious can she be, really? Louis breaks the kiss and gives her a tight-lipped smile before pushing her off and standing up, stuffing his flaccid dick back into his pants.

"Sorry," he tells her, his insincerity painfully obvious. "Tea and some breakfast sounds amazing right about now though, yeah?" Eleanor looks a bit disappointed, and yeah, Louis does feel a bit bad, but he just kisses her forehead and gives her a hug and she's back to normal, grinning and oblivious.

After breakfast Louis makes some excuse about having to go down to the fields to practice a bit, and leaves Eleanor alone in their flat. He calls his mate Stan, telling him to meet him at the fields, and when he gets there it's only a few minutes that pass before Stan arrives too.

They work on a few exercises in silence, switching from juggling to burpees to just passing the ball to each other, occasionally kicking it way out of the way just so the other one has to run and get it. It's when they're passing that Stan finally breaks the peaceful silence. "You nervous, Lou? For this season?"

Louis shrugs, looking at a point in the distance and not at Stan. "What've I got to be nervous for?" He swings his right foot back and plunges it forward, the inside of his foot making contact with the ball and shooting it across the distance between the two boys.

Stan stops the ball and traps it under one foot, staring at Louis with one hand on his hip. "Louis, it is a big deal, you know. Being team captain is a huge responsibility, and it's okay, in fact it's expected, if you're a bit nervous. I would be too."

"Pass the ball, you bloke," Louis retorts, but answers seriously anyways as Stan rears up to kick. "I don't want to let them down, you know? What if I'm not good enough?" He moves his body in front of the approaching ball and stops it, picking it up and tucking it under his arm, waiting for Stan's reply.

"That's rubbish and you know it!" Louis lets out a bark of laughter before raising the ball behind his head and throwing it as hard as he could at Stan, who heads it down to his feet. "You wouldn't be team captain if you weren't good enough."

"Bugger off," he bites back, and sweeps his damp fringe out of his sweaty face. It is true, though. They appointed Louis as team captain for a reason. The only thing he should have to worry about is bringing the team to the championships, which he fully intends to do. So they spend the rest of their time in silence, and Louis feels loads better about the incoming season, not only because of Stan's advice but also because playing football has a therapeutic effect on him.