No love left

Early Saturday morning i woke up,"Pearl"my mum said "get down here you're going to be late for school".I didn't want to go to school but no matter what she wouldn't let me be home schooled.I dressed in my usual attire of sweats and thick cardigans to go unnoticed.

As I made my way downstairs "hey honey" my mum said "want to eat with us". I don't know why she asked that question everyday she already knew the answer "no" I said before quickly making my way out the door .

I hated my mum for as far as I could remember she was just so fake. Everybody else saw her as Mary Joyce the child whisperer with the perfect family.Nobody even knew I was her daughter but I wanted to keep it that way. I cursed my dad wherever he was for forcing me here. He sent me here after the incident and he said he couldn't look at my face anymore as I looked like "him" .

Even thinking about it now brought tears to my eyes .He didn't want me nobody did .I was the ugly miserable messed up one.

As I reached school I was met by my usual hey "freak" ,ugly wannabe , loser" .I had gotten used to it now it didn't bother me. I don't get why they even bother to bully me I'm only fifteen . I have been home schooled ever since I was five so by the age of thirteen I was done college.

I headed to my usual spot at the back of the class when I was tripped by Amelie "oops" "everybody move out wide load coming through"."watch your way freak" .

I could feel the start of a panic attack coming through .I've been having them since I was ten . I rushed to the bathroom but I could still hear their laughter building up. I sat on the floor and cried as I felt the usual panic and feeling like you're going to die.

After an hour of just sitting there i gave up and went home early.Running to my room I collapsed into a ball and wished this day never happened.

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