For the Love of an Angel//Ed Sheeran

Chapter 9

I sat down on the sofa, fully prepared to hear what my mother had to say about Bryan, the devil is disguise. I dropped the towel to the floor and she stood pacing back and forth, trying to gather her thoughts and words. "Ariel...you have to marry Bryan." My mom said after a full minute of silence.

I hung my head, feeling anger rising up inside of me. "What if I don't want to."

"Ariel, why are you so selfish suddenly? That is not how I raised you!" She cried. She wore no make up, and her hair was hardly treated.

I glared at her. "I'm being selfish? You aren't the one being forced into a relationship with a man!" I laughed incredulously. She shook her head.

"Ariel, twenty seven years ago, I was where you were today. My parents wanted me to marry your father because he's a good man, and that's what they wanted from me. I didn't have any money in my family, and my father died a poor man, but look at what we have! Look at the nice lifestyle we've provided for you, Ariel! You cannot have that alone!"

My brain seemed to pause, and everything stopped as I thought about her words. "Are you saying that I have to marry Bryan to be able to continue living the way I am?"

My mom chuckled and shrugged. "Work? Who wants to work anyways? It's easier to just cook and clean, and roll over at night, Ariel." My mom laughed. I looked at her, appalled.

"What? Why would I ever want to live like that mom?" I cried. I cringed at the thought of having to "roll over" for Bryan. I never wanted him to touch me the way Ed touched me. The thoughts of us together last night still made my skin feel hot, so the thought of doing that with anyone but Ed was sickening.

"Christ, Ariel, because we need you too!" My mom screamed at me. "Can you stop acting like a self conceited child for just a minute and listen to us! This church is your father's pride and joy, and how fair would it be if he had to work himself to death over it, Ariel! All he ask is that you marry Bryan and keep it in our name! Wouldn't you like the church? Wouldn't that be a place where you would want to raise your children?"

I slumped in my seat. No, the answer was no. It was no, but it was so true. The church was my father's life. It was the reason why he was the man he was. He loved it, and I should be able to understand that. But I couldn't.

"Ariel, please? I swear you'll learn to love Bryan. It won't take any time at all! But your father needs this." My mom said. She placed her hand on my wet hair and stroked it gently. I looked down at my lap. She removed her hand, gathered her purse, then left me.

~

After classes, I asked Ed to meet me in the park. The snow had melted, and the sun was shining happily through the cotton-candy like clouds. I stood, looking at my boots, fighting temptation.

Always fighting temptation.

"Ariel!" I heard Ed call me. I whirled around, finding the happy ginger coming towards me. I almost smiled, but I had to look at the ground to keep myself in line. When he was close enough so that I could smell he sweet scent, he reached out for me but I took a step back. "What's wrong?"

I cleared my throat. "Everything." I replied, moving my words around the lump that was starting to form. Ed's smile faltered slightly.

"Did they hurt you?" He asked me, reaching for my arm, but I moved back again. I didn't want to have to do this, but I knew it didn't matter what he said or what my mother said. What matter was what was in my heart, and I had taken the time to not think about their biased opinions and just think about myself for a moment.

"No, Ed." I told him. I swallowed. "Ed, I can't...I can't do this with you anymore."

"Ariel, what are you talking about?" He demanded. I simply looked at a new flower, struggling to find its way towards the sun. "Look at me, will you?"

I quickly wiped away a few stray tears and looked up at him. "Yes?"

"What are you talking about, Ariel? What about last night? What about this morning? What about all the stuff you said?" He laughed, shaking his head. "That wasn't a lie, Ariel."

"I know, but I thought about what we did, and the way I've been behaving isn't right, Ed! We...we fornicated."

"Don't say it like that cause it wasn't what it was!" He snapped at me.

"Can you think about someone other than yourself for once?" I demanded at him. "I don't want to not be with you, but there are other people more important than just you and me."

"Well at least now I know where I stand for you. I told you I love you. I haven't been thinking about myself for a long, long time because all I've been wanting was you." He explained. He turned around, threading his fingers through his hair. "I fell so fast!"

"Ed, I'm sorry." I cried, choking out a heart broken sob. "I love you, but I can't. This isn't a right."

"You don't love me." He said. I reached for him, but he stepped back.

"Don't day that! If it was right, than you would be the person I would be with!" I explained. I attempted again to take hold of him, but he kept moving backward. I took his face in my hands and wiped the tears from his eyes. "Please don't cry. It'll get better I swear. You and I just weren't made for each other, and we got confused. But God made someone like me for just for you, and she'll love you better than I ever can."

Ed began to sobbing and pulled away from my, tears pouring out of his eyes. He was shaking, and it made me feel worse and the sight alone made me want to take back all my words and let myself give in to him. Ed used the sleeves of his hoodie to wipe his eyes, but the sobbing never ceased. I looked away, cleaning my own tears.

Ed took my in his arms and kissed my cheek, then my hair, then my shoulder, and my lips briefly, leaving his salty tears on my lips. I wedged my arms between our bodies and pushed him away. "Goodbye." I told him. He turned and walked away, his head hanging. I watched him leave, feeling him take the pieces of everything I had ever become with him as he left.

*

This is the shortest update by far but don't hate me _Give_Me_Ed_