"You should know," said Estella. "I am what you have made me. Take all the praise, take all the blame; take all the success, take all the failure; in short, take me."
~Great Expectations by Charles Dickens
I've always loved this book for some reason, to the point I cannot help myself but my fingers chose it from where it sets in my library.
as only my favorite collection rest there, because if this library contained each book I have read, it would invade the room, no place would be for my bed, nor my leather sofa, nor the fire place.
my fingers gently brushed against the paper as the voice in my head read that quote, closing the book. before resting it against the little rounded table beside my bed.
My eyes fixed upon my watch, to realize it's 7:30. Alright Mr. Edwards, just another ordinary day in this swirl I call life.
I got up slowly, my hand subconsciously lifts up, brushing the mess of my hair before rubbing the sleep from my eyes.
I head towards the shower, just like yesterday, tomorrow, and the day after.
The hot water immediately relaxing my pale skin. I enjoyed my fifteen minutes shower beneath the steamy water. I turned the water off then, I a! never late, in fact I despise those who are. my hand held the white towel before allowing the soft fabric to hug my damped body.
I brushed my teeth, then I looked in the mirror, fingers tangled through my wet short strands of my hair, heading towards the closet.
I chose my Cambridge/ medium grey Gucci suit. yet my aqua blue gaze fixed on a black giorgio armani tie. A smirk of accomplished immediately tugged the corners of my lips.
five minutes and I was ready. Car Keys, phone, my handbag ready as always, and now I am ready.
My drive was fifteen minutes as I reached Edgewater Kindergarten high school again. "Good morning professor, Edwards"
"Hello, Katianna" I responded gently, and there goes lover girl number one. Sarah as always waiting for me with that look in her eyes as if she saw Prince Charming. Steven used to like me better before Dayana 'his girlfriend tried kissing me'.
Truth is, what made me actually proud was the fact I am the best professor in the school, but who does not enjoy the attention. I received a text on my phone "Come pick her up after school. -Lillian"
Of course. it's Thursday and my daughter will be expecting me today, reasoning Lillian texted me, not that I would forget about Eva. Truth is I still want Lillian in my life, I still want her, I miss her.
The principle, Mr. Parker said only five minutes the bitch kept me for extra twenty damn minutes. I am late now. I pull my keys out and I get into the car, I put life into it as I start it, my foot pressing harder on the brake.
Trying my best to make the ride as short as I can. Another fifteen minutes passed till I reached the school. Is it written for I to spend most of my times between schools? my conscious mocked me but I chose to ignore it and pull over.
Lillian is already there. Her long brown wavey hair looks as beautiful as always. Casual tight jeans hugged her figure perfectly, and a simple white shirt, her chocolate eyes filled with anger as she held Eva's small hand.
There stood my little angel. I open the car's door, steps out as I allow my feet to carry me towards them. I gap my lips, wanting to pronounce something before Lillian cuts me off.
Her tone is harsh yet low, this is how she express her anger. "You've done enough for today, Noah. I'll take it from here" She said.
"Lili listen to me, you know I am never fucking late, don't make this harder." I press my lips into a thin line, why does she act like this all the damn time, do I really miss her..
Or am I simply missing the feeling of being settled. I try to push the thought away as we stood face to face, because she is the sweetest at times. of course I miss her!
"Let me make it up to you and her, please". I said, no obnoxious begging tone in my voice, only gentleness.
"No thank you. please. Leave for now" She said a tad harsher.
I nod slightly. My gaze shifts from her to the ground, my hand slides up, to fix my glasses a little before I turn my back and get inside my car again.
It's early, but I am definitely heading to a bar after this day. Usual one, not too crowded. Same table I am used to in the corner of the place where I sit and observe people. I simply enjoy analyzing their moves, relating things to my novels. Something I enjoy, and currently I need something I enjoy.
On my way there, after only five minutes of driving, this big sign that I subconsciously fix my gaze on, inviting sign, as if someone is rubbing it in my face. It talks about this huge party.
I read more and the caption captures my attention. The date says today, and most importantly a none stop party for 24 hours. Fancy, and why the heck not.
I pull my car, with a bit of hesitation, I head towards the bar, hoping to not meet any of my drunk students for tonight.
The more I approach the place, the more louder the music gets. I walk in, the place is damn huge, and I am slightly uncomfortable. a slight disgust expression on my face, my brow lifts a tad as my blue eyes canvass the place, scanning the slight of drunk wild people.
I chose a single table then I sit on it. I hear screaming, females screams and gentlemen whistles and claps, subconsciously I turn to see what are they screaming for, and there stood the bartender.
Clearly a very skillful one. Tank ripped top. His skin was inked, inked to the point it is impossible for you to see an inch clear. Tattoos garnished half of his face as well. long brown hair reaching his shoulders. quite tall as well.
each hand of his held a bottle of wine, twirling them around his fingers before he smashed the tips against each other, breaking the glass, glass bits did not scatter.
Clearly he was aware of his job, then he poured the crimson wine into the glasses. Is that the great show. Lucky woman she is the one you have. I thought. If you had one. I correct myself and rewards myself with a smirk at the comment I kept for myself.
Hang on, did the man just look towards my direction. I rewind my moves in my mind, have I made a sign to that bartender.
He jumps out of the bar, a lewd side smirk on his face as he approaches me. "Mr. Nerd I have some trick for you, sir" he yelled with his extremely husky deep voice and everyone cheered for him.
He flexed his shoulders a tad, quite a show off indeed. I am educated, and I bet if we made you a blood test, you would have 90% alcohol in your veins. I answer him in my mind but I chose to ignore him and only respond with a fake smile at his lame sentence.
