A Court of Ashes ↠ Peeta Mellark [3] ✓

10 ; Intertwining Threads

The cold air around Emberly's body quickly goes from brisk to cold. She's standing outside of her tent in Squad 451, watching as the volunteer tributes, along with Katniss, Gale, Finnick, and Peeta sit and eat the meals they'd packed.

With a black rifle tucked underneath her arm, Emberly chews roughly on her bottom lip, trying hard not to scream with the nerves that are trying to drown her underneath the thick water that is her thoughts.

She knows she'd trained her troops as best as she could, teaching them everything she'd learn her whole life; but somehow, she feels as though it wasn't enough. It's a nagging feeling that won't stop tickling the back of her brain, trying to get Emberly to burst like a bomb.

It's dark outside when Finnick starts a fire, his bronze hair glowing in the light as he eats a few beans from a can and rests his back against a chopped log. Katniss is sitting beside Gale,  both of them talking about something that Emberly can't hear because she's intently thinking about Noah. How he'd just been released from the hospital as they started loading up the trucks for the rebels, he'd been so groggy, Finnick had to lead him like a child into the car.

Jackson, a blonde haired girl whom is apart of Emberly's squad, divides them equally into shifts so that they can watch over Peeta and he at least is surrounded by someone he knows. Katniss goes first, her and Peeta staring at the fire in silence for an hour until it's Emberly's turn.

Peeta doesn't say anything, just focusing on staring at the flames of the fire as Emberly stiffly tries to ignore the awkward air in between the two of them. It didn't take until Peeta was gone for Emberly to fully cherish his presence.

"These last couple months must've been exhausting for you. Trying to decide if you love me or not. Back and forth. Back and forth. It must've been terrifying for you to see me come back when you seem to still not have the answer." Peeta says, breaking the silence and making Emberly lift her eyes to look at him across the fire.

Emberly bites her bottom lip, before she's shaking her head. "You intoxicated me, Peeta. Every moment of everyday; and I realize it wasn't until you.. left that I realized my need for you, how strong my craving for you was. I guess you were some type of drug. Bad for me in every way, but too damn addicting to stop."

Peeta is silent, staring at her with piercing blue eyes. "What kind of drug was I?"

Emberly smiles softly towards the ground, amused by Peeta's question. "I remember calling you novocaine in my head, but it's kind of something different now I guess."

Peeta's next question is almost inaudible. "What drug am I now? Be honest, please."

The 'please'  comes out more like a whine and Emberly bites her bottom lip because she's not used to expressing herself to Peeta this much. Not used to telling people how she feels about them, but then again, she's never felt this way about anyone else besides Peeta.

"Adrenaline." Emberly says, looking back up at Peeta. "You're my adrenaline."

Peeta is silent before he's speaking again. "Your hair is longer than I remember. It used to be shorter in my...memories. It was shorter, like almost shoulder length."

Emberly bites the inside of her cheek. "I've changed a lot since you...went away. You should get some rest, we have a big day tomorrow."

Peeta seems to nod his head, staring up at the sky before he's whispering something that Emberly barely catches but she hears it anyways. "Just because I let you go, doesn't mean I wanted to."

Emberly doesn't respond, because she doesn't know how to.

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In the morning, Emberly and the rest of the squad are told they'll be needing to record a highly complicated propo. It seems that Boggs and Plutarch are starting to find their footage bland and boring and are looking for a bit more excitement.