Just Be Friends

Chapter 1

Friday Part 1

I sat calmly outside, keenly observing my surroundings. People were possessed by the clamour and babbling noises. Everybody was on their own groups, sitting across on their wooden tables; each were having their own conversation, either their faces show goofiness and being giddy, happily chatting.

The debilitating air surrounds me with the mixture smell of meat, greasy foods, and breeze, lingering around the outside of cafeteria. My tray was left untouched. The dull aroma of God-knows-what-this-is nauseates me; making me puke together with the alleviating tense atmosphere between me and James, my boyfriend.

I silently stared at his face as he faces me, breaking a sweat, and standing in front of me. Nervousness was clearly consuming him. And I know how stupid I think this is, but I surely know what kind of talk he'll speak.

Calling me in an abrupt moment, of course; how could I possibly forget? How could I possibly not know? This happens all the freaking time!

"What's up, James?" I started to spoke, pretending to be frivolous, breaking this awkward situation between us.

His eyes darted on the grassy ground, scratching his neck. "Jennifer..."

"Hmm?" I try to force a smile; a stupid smile. A smile that seems so perfect but it's so broken inside. And no one seems to notice it.

"The thing is...I think we should take a break." He blurted out, looking spuriously in pain.

"You're breaking up with me?" I asked, oddly eyeing him.

"Jenn... come on..." He cooed. "Look... I'm really sorry but I don't think we should continue this relationship anymore. You deserve better than me."

You deserve better than me. Oh Jesus, I've heard that sentence more than a million times. "Okay, just quick one question," I signalled my finger. "Your real reason?"

"Wait... is there some kind of tric-"

"No. No no no. And just for your complete understanding, I'm not even one bit affected by this breakup. So why?"

"Well, Jenn... you're beautiful, really beautiful, I admit that," I know that. You don't have to tell me. "And I know I told you I like you and going out with you was really great. It's really fun going out with a beautiful girl like you," What do you take me for? A Barbie doll? "But you're really different from what I expected. I'm sorry but, I totally hated your bitchy personality and you're sometimes irritating and clingy. And-"

"Okay. That's enough. Thank you," His words struck me with a shocking lightning, making me gasp a little bit. It was the first time someone had told me, face to face, that I had a bitchy personality. It was shocking yet, it makes the hatred inside me germinate.

He stared to walk away, taking a step at a time. His back clearly shows he's utterly happy that he's been released, walking confidentially towards his friends.

"Asshole," I spurted in a low tone voice. So much for cliché breakup moments.

No hard feelings; this happens all the time. Prying repeatedly this stupid, no-future relationships, I was already invincible between my feelings.

It's normal; the code of behaviour of human is to judge a person by looks; especially men. They tend to look at the woman's face first, her curves, and even maybe legs and then chest. But that's all there is. They don't try to bother things that they don't see -especially the heart. They don't like me as a person; rather, they stupidly proclaim that they 'like' me just because of my looks.

It's all about my face, anyway. They arrogantly tell me they like me but it all ends the same; breakup. They end up being disappointed in me because they said my looks were totally different from my personality. And all I'm asking is someone who will love me together with this 'shitty personality'.