Emerald (A Harry Styles fanfiction)

Chapter 2

N A T A L I E

I never knew what caused my depression. Maybe because the kids at school didn't like me or because I always felt like the odd one out. Either ways its there, and its never going to leave.

I also knew that with my depression and anxiety came nightmares. Depression haunted my day while nightmares haunted my sleep. It was all driving me crazy and I couldn't even control it.

And that exactly was what happened Friday night. The green eyes turned into red ones and the hope turned into fear and devastation, and as usual I died in the end.

Meh. At least I learnt how to control my panic attacks last summer.

And God, I hate Mondays.

I got out of bed and into the bathroom. Quick hot showers always fix me up, washing away both the dirt and tension off my body.

I wrapped a fluffy white towel around myself then opened my closet to get dressed. Black skinny jeans, black t-shirt, red and black plaid flannel and to top it off my black Doc Martens decorated my feet.

Usually I didn't use a lot of make up, and that day was no different. A bit of foundation to clear my skin, powder to help the foundation not look shiny, mascara, and nude lipstick.

I grabbed my backpack and keys and headed straight downstairs. My parents must have been still asleep since no one was around.

I took a banana, a sandwich, and a bottle of water then trotted to the car. Turning the radio on, I cursed at the traffic that would sure make me late for school.

Once the traffic cleared up, I sped towards Hell. Oh sorry I mean school. You see, I hate school. I absolutely and utterly despise school. School is just another word for Hell.

I parked my car and quickly went to my locker to take my books out and head to first period.

"Hey Natalie," I heard snickers following behind the voice that spoke. "Still crying about your little prince charming who left you all alone? Aww poor baby Nate."

I bit my tongue to stop myself from saying anything. That was Samantha, basically the school bitch. She enjoys nothing in life but torturing people, specifically me.

"You're a bitch, Natalie. You stole my boyfriend. You made him hate me." She spoke when she sensed that I wouldn't reply. Her words were laced with venom that were targeted to poison my mind and heart.

I still remained silent as I turned to walk the other way.

"Don't walk away when I'm talking to you, you...you worthless ugly bitch!" She screeched as the hallway suddenly became silent.

"You enjoy doing that, don't you? You enjoy embarrassing yourself and acting like a somebody when you're clearly a nobody." I scoffed and walked away without another single word being spoken. "Ohhhh"'s and laughs followed and I had a smirk on my face. Her face was priceless though.

I reached English class, took my seat and stared off into space waiting for the bell to ring signaling that class started.

Getting out my journal, I started thinking about all the things that were going through my mind. They're sick thoughts. No one should ever think like that. But I do, I do think like that.

Dear diary,
I've been feeling really bad lately. Everything is going the wrong way. Remember Samantha? She used to be my best friend, but ever since he realized how ugly she really was on the inside, she's been taking it all out on me. I want to go home, curl in my bed and watch some Netflix. But I know that I have to "fight through this and smile!" 
But it's been really hard. I miss him. I miss him so much. All I need is a sign. A sign that he still remembers me. Remembers our time together. But that won't happen for sure.