Mr. Trying Hard Baklang Tissue Paper (Short Story)

*Ringgggggggggggggg Ringggggggggggggggggggg*

"Okay. Class, you may go now. See you next meeting."

"Girl, una na ako huh. May emergency sa bahay. Si Dory, yung fishda ko sa baler, nalunod. Eh si mudara wa knows mag mouth to mouth, knowing lang nun mag-torrid. Hihihi."

Hay. Gravity itong bestpal kong shokla. Ehem.

Si Wilfred yun. Bestfriend ko, bading. Obviously.

Palusot na naman yan. If I know, may ka-meet na naman yang boylet.

"Palos ka Wilfredo. Sino na naman ba nadekwat mo?" Nakakahawa language niyan eh.

"Che! Wilfred. Who's that? Girl, I'm Wilda. Okay?" Ayan na naman yan sa kaka-Wilda niya.

Palabas na kami ng building.

Papunta ako sa canteen, siya naman... Somewhere down the road. Haha.

"Sige na girl. Mauuna na ako at----- Wait. Is that Eric? The most hot shotokobels in town? Or better yet my future otoko (boyfriend)?"

I turned to where he's... I mean "she" is looking at.

Yeah. It's Eric Marasigan. Hearthrob.

Nakatitig parin si Wilfred sa kanya.

At ng dumaan na si Eric...

He looked at me. Or maybe Wilfred. And smiled.

He's really cute. But out of reach. Sino ba naman ako? 😔

Stop the drama.

I turned to Wilfred na habol parin ang tingin kay Eric.

"Bakla. Tuloy laway mo." Sabi ko ng lumampas na siya samin.

"I would sell my body to a devil just to have him for atleast one night." Sabi ng bakla na parang nagde-daydream.

"Tumigil ka na nga! Umalis ka na. Ima-mouth to mouth mo pa si Dory ano ka ba! Haha" Pabiro kong sabi saka pinagtutulak siya palabas ng building.

"Eh kung si Fafa Eric nalang i-mouth to mouth ko?"

I just stared at him with a fvcking straight face.

"Oh? What's with that face? Gelli De Belen (jealous) ang peg. I know it! Bet mo din si Fafa Eric." Naglalakad na kami at natigilan ako sa pinagsasabi niya.

Yeah. I do like him. Matagal na. But I just keep it myself.

Kahit na bestfriend ko itong baklang ito, di ko pwede ishare. Eh sa ingay ba naman nito oh.

"Shut up. Sige na nga. Dito na ako sa canteen. Nagugutom ako sa pinagsasasabi mo. Ingat ka! Text me if na-rape ka na! I love you, Wilfred!" I said as we part ways. Pero may pahabol pa si bading.

"I love you, Wilfred ka diyan! Eh kung duraan kaya kita! Sige. Baboosh!"

Canteen.

Ano bang meron tuwing 3PM at laging puno ang canteen?

I search for a vacant seat.

And voila, may isa pa!

I hurriedly walk to it when...

"Oops..."

Nagtitigan lang kami. And guess who is it.

Si Eric.

"You can take the seat. Maghihintay nalang ako----"

"Are you with someone?" I asked him.

"Hmm. No. Alone." He answered.