Unsaid

After She Left: Day 1

"Are you sure you'll be fine by yourself here? Your roommate settles in tomorrow."

"Mom, I'm eighteen. Living six hundred miles away from you and Dad; starting off my freshman year in some college I know so little about; staying at some dorm room with a girl whose name I remember, actually sounds like sushi – being alone on my first night isn't really a biggie."

"It's Susie, Maxine."

I looked at Mom questioningly.

"Your roommate, her name's Susie. It's just . . . I don't feel comfortable leaving you here all alone, sweetie. Maybe we could stay the night, Ellis? Just so our little Maxi will have some company."

"She's eighteen, honey. She'd slept next to our room for quite a long time now. It's about time to put her independence to practice."

Dad winked at me and everything's settled. They helped me unpack a couple of boxes and then I saw them off. With a kiss on the forehead from Dad and a tight hug from Mom, I bid my parents goodbye.

It took me three hours straight to put my stuff into place. It was already nightfall when I changed into my pajamas and settled on my bed. Since I came up here first, I got to pick my own spot – bed on the rightest corner which is a little farther away from the main door, nearer to the bathroom, with a study table on the side that faces the window overlooking the bay and the courtyards of Berkeley.

Tomorrow begins a new chapter of my life. Tomorrow, I'll be walking the hallways of a college I am yet to explore; I'll be meeting new faces I am about to know, and understand, and make friends with – tomorrow, it's all going to be a brand new start and a brand new me. Six hundred miles is quiet a distance from the past I intend to bury and forget. It should be enough.

I've given up a lot of things just to get right where I am right now. Whatever happens in college, I hope in the deepest parts of my heart . . . that it'll all be worth it.