Well, it was good while it lasted.
No-- It was amazing while it lasted.
I couldn't believe it's only been 4 years since I discovered and became close to this boy... Since we became bestfriends .
Since the four years that we met, there's only been four months that we actually dated.
And then it was over. Just two months ago.
And now he's going off to college.
"Need anymore help, Adrian?" His dad rested a hand on Adrian's shoulder and used the other to gesture to the last huge box.
"Uhh... sure. Thanks dad. That's the last And you're off?" Adrien asked while Mr. Sender lifted the box with a grunt.
"Yep."
"Are you sure? Are you leaving anything? Make sure u won't have to make two trips". There's was a certain hushed excitement in his voice that made my stomach tingle with some unknown feeling.
Mr. Sender must've noticed it too because he set the box down and stared at Adrien for a moment while a blush crept up his neck.
"YES, Adrien. I'll meet you at the campus. Me, your cousin, and uncles will be setting up but remember -- BE THERE by FOUR. We're not putting moving you into the dorm all by ourselves ! Just so you can sit around and... Be lazy." Mr. Sender gave his son that weird suspicious one eyed squint thing he does. And winked at me, walking out the door.
He slowly went over to the door and closed it behind his father. My heart jumped a little with the thud of the door closing. And he turned around to face me. I shift to my right foot. After four years, I still feel nervous when I have his undivided attention.
Me and Adrien were alone.
Trying to take the attention off my awkwardness, I bring up his step mother. "Where's Leah?"
"I said goodbye to her earlier before she left for work, around 10:30 this morning," He muttered distantly, strutting his way over to face me.
"Oh.. She's going to, uh.. miss... You.... " I trail off because he's staring intently into my eyes for longer than normal for him.. something he never does, and the chocolate brown gaze makes me feel naked.
I know where this is going.
"Jenn..." He started
"Are you hungry?" I walk into the kitchen. And get the cupboards flying open.
"Jenn."
"I could make sandwiches? Or a salad. With iced tea.. It's hot out- I want a drink, do you? you guys have some ice?
"JENNIFER, LISTEN."
His hand is on my arm as his spends me around to face him. My back against the kitchen sink.
He tilts my face up to look at him "Jennifer.. Listen, I know what I did. But do you really want me to leave, for college, without us ever discussing this???"
"What is there to discuss!" Adrien.. That's it -- you chose what you wanted, that's it that's all," I never raise my voice at him and it's a real struggle to force the anger I feel into it. I turned away and try to hide my stinging eyes.
I feel warm arms snake around my waist from behind and I melt.
"I thought I knew what I wanted... It was her. I wanted Brittany for a long time. Honestly, my feelings were all over the place, not for just her. But now I know what I need.
"Now I know why it's never worked with anyone else.. Its, you. Its always been you Jen.",
I blink away my tears as I turn to face him.
"So that's it? We get into one fight, you leave me thinking she'll be easier and then when it's proven that she's not... What? I'm the second choice?"
It was only then I realized that trying to swallow my tears was a wasted effort. My voice was shaking.
"What?! Jennifer,.. You're not making sense. I chose you first. I've know her longer than you I could've had her whenever." His words were coming out so fast "But you came into my life and after a while... Something changed."
His face was flushed with feeling and so close, with his hands besides me on both sides of the sink. I search his eyes for some sort of deceit. All I saw was remorse. And I couldn't stand to look into them anymore.
"Please come back to me, we've both made mistakes. Some we can fix, some we can't. And I don't want to leave for college knowing one of those I can't was hurting you"
"Adrien... I love you, but I can't deal with you're ever changing feelings," I sigh and roll my eyes remembering the seldom times I felt like I wasn't enough.
"And I love you. I know you can't believe anything really changed. The other thing that ever affected us was my mistake of thinking with my head and not my heart. I don't know why I would do that. Slow people should always go with their hearts"
I giggle a little and then cover my mouth. Ugh, he always makes me weak.
His long fingers meet mine and pulls them between both his hands.
My heart does a little leap when the full pink lips I love kisses my hand. I wrap my arms around his neck, playing with his curls and look up at him,
"You're absolutely right about that. I need you as much as you need me and we should've.. Waited before deciding it was over Adrien."
"No matter what happens I don't think it will ever really be over. This kind of feeling, hold you here, right now, like this," He tightens his grip around my waist and presses himself closer to me. "It just doesn't go away." He smiles and for the first time in what feels like forever. His face lights up and his eyes matches his smile.
I smile back just as big until I think about our situation. It's so easy to get lost while wrapped up in him.
"I don't want you to go away" I say sincerely. College. It can be so much of a permanent kind of things when you're in a different city.
After looking away and seeming to be musing seriously, he gazes back down at me
He's smilimg micheviously and I know he's back. The boy who would do anything just for us to be together.
"I have a way to make sure that doesn't happen. I mean, for now at least. Give me an excuse and one hour and I can make this one of our best memories."
