Finding Jennifer Parks

Chapter 1: This is Me

My fingers tremble as they glide down the keys of my grand piano. I'm thinking really hard and praying that I don't mess up. I try to concentrate on the music in front of me, but I'm just too nervous knowing that my father is in the room next to me. And I just know he's sitting there, listening, ready to pounce at any mistake I make. I'm almost at the end when my concentration is broken and my pinky finger goes one key too low. Right when I hit that G, I hear stomping feet coming from across the hall.

Scared out of my senses, I try to cover it up but I know it's already too late. "Madison Jane Parks" my dad screams at the top of his lungs. "Was that a G I heard, when you were supposed to play an A?" I bow my head in shame and respond,

"Yes father" I can feel the anger building up inside of him.

"When will you ever get it right, Madison? You're completely useless, you will never be as good as your mother!" He then looks me dead in the eye and says, "I want you to play that piece over and over again until your fingers bleed." He stomps away, leaving me with my tears streaking down my cheeks.

My dad wasn't always this harsh. He was actually very kind before my mother left, but ever since she did, he has been comparing me to her. Saying that I'm not good enough and how it's impossible for me to be my mothers daughter.

My father loves my brothers though, I think he would have been more than pleased to have had 4 sons, but his fourth child was a girl...me! My mother was over excited to hear that it was a girl once I came out. Which confuses me even more of why she left. Why didn't she take me with her?

I was 8 years old when my mom evacuated the household. To this day I don't understand why. She seemed so happy, from what I can remember she was beautiful, so elegant and lovely. Musical and talented, she had the voice of an angel. She sang me to sleep every night. I loved her deeply and was devastated when I heard she had gone.