The First Time Our Mother Spoke To Us

The Letter

It had been two days since their mother had passed away. Two days since their father had began his boycott in his study. And two days since the grim funeral where they glimpsed their mothers beautiful moon kissed face being lowered into the cold ground.

They had been grieving since they had understood her plight and this new grief felt no different to the one they'd carried upon their shoulders since the beginning. Their mother was a mute who had lost the ability to talk. It used to make them uncomfortable to be picked up by their mother from school as all the other children saw her peculiarness and ensured that the girls suffered their mockery for it.

Yet though their mother spoke no words their father loved her deeply and had come crushed from the grocery, tears cascading down his face like a waterfall as he told them of their mothers demise. He had also given them a scroll kept together with both the girls ribbons, one blue and one green from kindergarten and told them it was from their mother to be opened after her death.

Now was the moment as the sisters sat before the scroll in their midnight black mourning gowns in apprehension of the last words their mother had for them.

My girls it began, my darlings I'm going to come clean to you both as I never could when living. I assume your father lives still if this has gotten to you both and after you read through this letter I hope with all my heart that you will understand me better.
Your mother, Rochelle

The girls exchanged an excited and pensive look with one another as they picked up the next sheet.

It was 1938 when I met your wonderful father. A funny exchange I'll never forget. I was hurrying home from the grocery and he was going to work on his bicycle. Being clumsy I almost ran into him and would have had he not swerved and fallen into the bushes. A situation that was meant to be awkward became so confusing for him as I burst out laughing and continued doing so as his face reddened. Being the charmer he was he composed himself and with a starry awestruck look in his eyes he asked that in exchange for his humiliation before me he take me to dinner. And that girls is where our blooming romance came from and we got engaged that fall.

Our wedding was to be in spring yet war loomed over us and the terrible incident too occurred. My darlings you see I was a gorgeous polish girl who lived in quite a liberal family and my father believed that I should be allowed to do all a man can. It never was a problem me roaming alone but you see once it was dark and a man with eyes like sapphires was walking by me. He began talking to me and gave me subtle look overs when he thought I didn't know. When the situation got too much I tried to leave but he had me by the waist in his killer grip. Your father was out of town then and this man knew that. I had been in a mini dress and sandels. The man was a looker and knew it. He took me to his car and to a bar somewhere else. No one knew me then and there was a gun pressed to my back. Girls I was scared out of my wits and played his game. I sat on his lap and let him buy me whatever drink he wanted in me. There was nothing I could do. In this town I was nobody and being nobody in Poland meant no one cared. I felt his hands grope me seductively and the drinks made his work easier. I let him paw me and he picked me up, taking me to his room.

There his eyes had a predatory glint and he took me. He was rough and callous, there wasn't a place he hadn't explored and during the final step the booze had let go their hold on me. It was then in my senses that I tried to leave but he moved his fingers in me more softly and whispered sweet nothings in my ears whilst humping me. He didn't let me go. He took my virtue that night and three more too until your father found me. Girls I had never been more scared than this and your father saw what that beast had done. The rest is for your father to share if he wants but then the truly terrible event occurred on our way home. I was quiet cradled in your fathers arms as he did his best to comfort me but his silence as we got to the town made me look up to witness the most scarring thing I had ever seen.

My town and livelihood was burning. To the ground. Hitler had come. I am so glad you girls live in an era where no worries like this have to bother you but my mind was scattered and in pieces. I had trouble breathing and had tumbled out of your fathers arms and ran towards my house. He gave chase after me stricken with pain yet also worried. I've always been a high spirited girl and I ran through the fire, the crumbling houses and the burning flesh under my feet to your grand parents house and what greeted me made me speechless. For the rest of my life. My parents were burning before me and trying to climb out of the window. Their screams resonated in my ears as I watched them melt and get burnt to the crisp. The smell of their cooked flesh still makes me nauseous and I remember that they saw me. All around me was chaos and, screaming and flesh cooking. It still haunts me this and girls these events are the reason I lost the ability to speak.

Your father had joined me then and took me away to his parents who lived beyond the town of whislington in the house we know own.

I am sorry for the mother you could have had girls and I have tried to be the best I could to you both yet I know the embarrassment I caused you both. I just need you to know that I love you both ever so much. My love for you burns brighter to me than what occurred in 1940.

Your mother with all her love