The thoughts.. all the thoughts ran through me.. I only thought about my family members.. to convince me this was wrong.. I stood at the cliff.. I looked down and saw the waves crashing against the rocks.. silence.. it was silent all around me.. I looked at my wrists, the bruises were healing but.. it's not like the pain is healing too.
I take one step closer, my thoughts are "I'm sorry family, I'm sorry for being something you didn't want me to be" I look up to the sky it's bright.. it's sunny and ... and I.. can't tolerate it anymore.. I'm going.. this life is not for me.. I can't live up to my parents expectation, I can't pretend to be something I'm not anymore!
I think about my family once more.. the last memory I have of them is them smiling at a family picnic.. god I wish that.. that the times were like that again.. I step forward.. slowly peering over the cliff. I didn't hear the screech of tyres behind me or footsteps as I shuffled right to the edge. I get ready to dive in making sure my head impacts first and as soon as I lean forward getting ready to go I feel the tug of someones hand upon my arm
"ARE YOU CRAZY?" I hear as this figure pulls me into his chest gripping my head against his chest. I feel his muscular body against my cheek "What in god's name do you think you were doing?!"
I push him away "Why did you just do that?!" I shout " I WAS READY! AND YOU RUINED IT! THIS TOOK WEEKS OF PLANNING AND BUILDING UP COURAGE!"
He runs his hands through his brown hair messing it up slightly " Look, please don't shout.. I.. I can't see someone else end their life.. I'm sorry I ruined it.. but I didn't want to come up here and see THAT" He exaggerates.
"Why are you here anyways? Who are you?" I ask questioning him, I can feel the warm summer breeze up my dress.
"Ok look how about we step away from the cliff, I won't get you in the car or anything but just sit on the hood.. I'll explain everything but just.. Step away from the cliff" I could hear the fear in his voice as he stammered upon words.
"Ok, but I refuse to sit in your car and for you to take me anywhere" I tell him cautiously. I walk towards the hood of the car and carefully sit myself on it.
He comes to sit by me putting his hands on his lap and sitting a small distance away from me.
"Alright, I'm Joe, I came here today because.. I was really down.. it's beautiful out here right?" He asks me turning his head to me
" I couldn't agree more but.. why did you stop me?" I look at him with confusion
"My brother had commited suicide.. I didn't want to see.. someone else.. lose their future" He tells me, He hangs his head slightly and thats when he looks up my arm "Did you.. cut?" he asks in shock
I nod "Yes, I did" I tell him, I mean there was no point in lying right? He had already caught me.. "Please.. don't tell a shrink or my parents or anyone!" I beg him as I jump off the hood of the car and get on my knees
He gets off and picks me up "No I won't but i'm not leaving you here.. Not like this" I feel his hands on my shoulders as he starts to pick me up, he leads me to his car and sits me in the seat buckling me up, I'm crying almost flooding the car.
I feel his eyes on me, I look at him and see him smirk "So what was that about refusing to sit in my car?" He asks as he starts the engine.
"Shut up" I wipe my tears and shove him in a playful manner.
When we get in Joe touches the play button, the speakers boom out one of my favorite songs, we hum to the lyrics as we drive home, I walked here but when we drove past some places we saw the beautiful scenery tapping our fingers along to the music, I watch Joe as his hair flops in the wind. We arrive at my house, it's a big house but it gets very isolated.
I hear a gasp "Wow" I hear from the left of me I turn my head to see Joe inspecting my house.
"Seriously Joe, you should be glad you don't live here, it get's so lonely and just fustrating" we park up and I open my door I get out my keys which are in my pocket. I open the door and Lucindra our maid is in the hallway.
"Oh Natalie" she wraps her arms around me I shrug away "Why have you been gone so long?" she asks.
I look back at Joe "I was out and bumped into a friend, Lucindra, do you mind fixing us up with some snacks it's been a while since we ate and we both are hungry" I explain to her before Joe can get a word in.
Joe smiles kindly in the back, it's not a perfect smile, slightly lopsided but it suited him. Better than that smirk anyways.
"Come in" I tell him as I watch him come in looking around I close the door behind him "Where do you want to sit? My room, Main room, Cinema room or Back garden?" I ask him as Lucindra bustles off starting up some snacks for us.
"Cinema room would be nice but I think the garden would be nicer" He smiles, it's a kind smile but not a ' I feel sorry for you because you wanted to commit suicide' more like a ' I actually want to be friends or get to know you' smile.
"Garden it is" I lead him to the garden through the back room I lead him to the back where the swing is under the shade.
Lucindra comes back with our snack and puts them on the table in front, Joe smiles at her and she returns the smile as I dig in hungrily and sip my drink.
Joe lets out a chuckle "It's interesting watching a girl of your size scoff down food" as he picks up a piece and chews on it letting out a moan "MMM This stuff is great! Does she do take aways?!" he asks me.
"Firstly, yes Lucindra does give our guests a little take out if they want and Secondly HEY!" I throw a grape at him and he scowls.
"Fiesty" he remarks as he sips his drink and picks the grape off his lap eating it happily.
"Pig" I retaliate.
Both of us happily eat our snack like little kids who have just met in primary school. After finishing Joe clear's his throat.
"Natalie was it?" he asks
I nod and say "Yes?" I dab my mouth with the tissue.
"If you don't mind me asking why do you do this?" he lifts my arm and shows me the scars, just the thought of me doing that does make me sick but it feels so good and makes me feel better because my parent's expect too much of me, I'm ignored and I feel like shit when they talk about me because the only thing they can say is how crap I am at one thing or another but why should I explain this to a stranger?!
"Why do you want to know?" I ask him cautiously.
"Well Princess, I want to help you, if you let me of course" he replies simply like it was the most obvious thing.
"And if I don't want help?" I ask hesitantly
"Don't kid yourself natalie, I saw your face when I showed you your own arm, you were in disbelief, so tell me why you do this to yourself?" He has a growl to his voice, normally I'd giggle but he seemed serious.
I stand and look at the white wall "Why do you care?" I ask, before he can get a word in "Why are you here? You were only suppose to drop me!" I shout looking back at him.
"Because I care about you more than you care about yourself! Stop being a selfish bitch" He stands and steps closer shouting, the sun highlights his perfect brown locks, Icey blue eyes staring at me intently.
"Get out of my house" I mutter and then find him still standing there "GET OUT!" I shout I go behind him and push him towards the door, luckily Lucindra was not looking as I shove him out of the door "Get out and stay out! I don't want to know you and you shouldn't want to know me! So piss off!" I scream as I slam the door in his face. Tears roll down my cheeks as I lean against the door, I wipe them and run upstairs "Luci, I don't want dinner please don't call me" I tell her, I hear a " but Nat!" before I slam my door shut.
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Hiya, this is my first part, I hope you enjoyed it leave a comment and tell me what you think
Writer; KBear
